Laid Back Lion

Tuesday > Reviewsday

2010-03-30T15:00:00.001+01:00

I’ve decided to put my three main hobby updates here in weekly sections. Music, Movies, Reading.

Movies: I watch a film last night, which has got to be the bloodiest film I’ve seen in ages. It was called Ninja Assassin (just by the name alone, I knew I had to watch it). It was basically about a rouge ninja student going against the other ninjas to foil their assassination attempts in revenge against his mentor. (there was a government side story, but I thought it to be boring). It was very well put together and the fight scenes… although very bloody and savage, still kept hold of a artsy dance kind of look. It was weird.. kind of like a 70s Bruce Lee film. The last scene for example. The main character pits his skills against his mentor. The whole floor is covered in blood and the main character is sliced more then a chopped up cucumber but still finds a way to walk about the place. It is cheesy and something women stay well away from, but still, for pure action lovers, its a film thats well worth checking out.

Books: I’ve been reading Sherlock Holmes lately and really enjoying it. Not because of the recent movie (although it has strengthened my interest) but because of an iPhone app called Wattpad. It has thousands of classic novels on it including the works for Sir Arthur Conan Doyle and I had been meaning to check them out for a while now. I started off with the short story collections under title “Adventures of / Memoirs of” and I must say I’m hooked. What attracts me to the books is the eccentricity of Sherlock Holmes and his methods of solving the crimes, the bafflement of the people around Holmes when he comes to his conclusions, the why people talked at the start of the century and mostly, the way the stories are depicted from the view point of that other then the main character. I’m going to move onto Hound of the Baskervilles next I think and then onwards through the collection. :)

Music: For the past month or so, I’ve been listening to the Stereophonics’ new album Keep Calm and Carry on. Whenever a song from the album comes on my iPhone, i dont skip at all. The Stereophonics are a Welsh rock band that formed in 1992 in Cwmaman, Wales and are a part of the Cardiff Rock Scene. They’ve brought out loads of songs in their career and many of them I’ve loved. They did take a break from the rock sound they started off doing by doing mellower songs like Have a Nice Day and Mr Writer, which were alright, but I thought they didn’t suit it.

They gradually got back on form with their Language, sex, violence, other? Album, and have come into their own with their latest album, which isn’t as recognised as it should be in my view. It has classic a Stereophonic but also a bit of Oasis too (one of my other fave bands). Nearly every song on their new album I love. Kelly Jones's rough, Rod Stewart-esque voice belts out on the songs on this album, such as Shes Alright, Innocent, Uppercut and 100mph. Check out the album when you can and you'll be blown away.

From Me to You - Part 2

2010-03-29T19:01:00.004+01:00

“Dear friend,

I’m ever so sorry, but unwillingly and involuntarily, I have infected you with a cold…..

Hope you enjoy your gift, from me to you, and I hope you get well soon.

MK “

Oh dear oh dear, looks like I’ve been a “Typhoid Mary”* between friends and work colleagues lately. When having the cold myself, I’ve passed on the virus to friends and colleagues who have in turn become unwell. Not good at all. I’m all fully recovered now, but they are still suffering. “Oh troublesome virus! How I hate thee!” I do hope they get well soon, one in particular, a 60+ year old colleague, who has it now. I feel guilty, but there’s nothing I can do really… is there?

Kal pullin a face at park

The weekend past went by fine. I minded my son Kallam from Saturday morning – Sunday evening. It was great because I love spending time with him. We took a trip to the park yesterday, where we went to see the ducks and swans at a nearby lake and went to the local park where he climbed and had fun on the climbing frames with me. Naturally, I got involved myself and found myself messing about with him on them. The father/son bond is definitely there and we seem to be able to make each other laugh without even lifting a finger plus can equally just sit and watch TV in comfortable silence. A part of me is hoping he will take most of my good traits (creativity, patience, good manners and positivity) with him into adulthood, but a part of me wants him to come into his own, excel in his own right and make me a very much more proud father.

Dating wise.., its non existant. I've asked a few out but with less then desireable responses. "i dont want to lead you on", "but you're my friend!" or "thanks, but I'm not ready for a relationship yet". I guess my time will come. I've recently added again on facebook the girl i was seeing before christmas, but i'm not revisiting that yet. I want to keep trying for Miss Right. So, hopefully, with time I'll find her, not through acting all desperate, but through patience and making the right choices. We'll see.

[*“Mary Mallon also known as Typhoid Mary, was the first person in the United States to be identified as a healthy carrier of typhoid fever. Over the course of her career as a cook, she is known to have infected 53 people, three of whom died from the disease.”]

From me to you.

2010-03-24T16:06:00.000Z

I’ve been ill lately. “I’m afraid its terminal….. man flu”. Great…… As usual I’ve battled on through and not let it get in the way of work. It has however, caused everyone I’ve been in contact with to catch it too. I just shrug it off and make myself believe that they’ve caught it off someone else, which for all I know, they have. I’m taking flu pills and drinking loads in an attempt to banish the damn virus from me, but all it leaves me with is frequent trips to the lavatory and a bitter taste in my mouth…. I don’t actually seem to be getting better! I’ve had it now from around this time last week and I’m hoping I’ll be alright by the weekend. Fingers crossed.

Last weekend went alright. I had Kallam and his older brother overnight at my ex’s again….. reluctantly. In no way was it because I shun daddy duties, but I had promised my best bud, James, that I would go to his father’s 60th birthday party at theirs. My ex insisted that she asked me first earlier this year and reluctantly, I had to apologise profusely to James, which he was ok about. I promised him I would go out on the town with him on the Saturday, so all was good. When settling down for the night on my own, while the kids were in bed, I realized the TV memo (remote) was knackered, so I couldn’t watch TV, the internet at her house was knackered too due to the internet connection being intermittent and disconnecting every few minutes and there was no gas. Perfect. I soon called it an early night and went to bed. I spend most of Saturday daytime spending quality time with Kallam and playing with him and his brother. I love spending time with Kallam. Kallam is calm, is content playing on his own, likes to just sit and gives hug randomly, tells me when he needs the toilet and is perfectly fine health wise. I couldn’t ask for a better son. Proud daddy alert!

Saturday night came and me and James ended up going out on the town with his brothers. I felt the odd one out as, they were all bald (or going bald in James’s case) and there’s me with a full head of hair. :-P Also that I wasn’t a relative, but they soon adopted me when some women were asking who everyone was. With me being tired and unwell, I wasn’t in the mood for any usual flirting or mysterious looks from across the room type action, so I focused on the England v France rugby match, which was good to watch (normally I don’t watch rugby). We then went to a club in town called BBs and it was empty. This is mostly because everyone goes to a bigger and better one called The Establishment. Why we didn’t go I dunno, but we stayed there and the eye candy there was little to be admired. Blonde bimbos with fake eyelashes, and skimpy dresses. Not my type at all. I did however have a catch up with someone who was out who I used to go school with. He hadn’t done anything interesting with his life, but it was a good catch up non the less. I left around 12 rather then the usual 3am, because I was bored and tired.

Sunday just consisted of lazing around at my dads, where I slept overnight because it’s a shorter trip from town, watched the Liverpool v Man U match and then headed on home to laze around some more with my housemate Will playing Call of Duty and Pro Evolution Soccer. Wills a smooth talking, indie music lovin, football obsessed, weed smoking guy, and he’s fun to hang around with. This Sunday I got a glimpse of his smooth talking first hand. I’m totally the opposite, especially on the phone. I don’t like phoning people. I’m better then what I was like not so long back, but he does it so effortlessly with wit and humour and could chat for Britain at parties or on a night out. I wish I had social skills like that. Don’t get me wrong, when with the right people, I come into my own, but I still find it hard to sustain conversations and keep the ball rolling. Its not a confidence issue no more with me, its inexperience. Gonna have to work on it.

On another note, being a big Beatles fan, I would have thought I would have been all over Beatles Rock Band like a Orangutan in a banana farm and I was….. until the novelty wore off. You see, it’s a party game, and playing it solo is boring, especially when your as good as me. There isn’t go challenge. Plus with the parties we have, they are all 19+ and are into their heavy metal and emo music. Beatles don’t even come into the equation. So I’m going to be selling it, sad as it may seem. I might purchase Call of Duty World at War instead to go with my Call of Duty Modern Warfare 2, I dunno.

Thats it for now. Will update laters.

Blue Moon Blog

2010-03-19T13:33:00.001Z

Here’s my once-every-blue-moon blog. Its been a while, but since I’ve still been getting comments on my last entry, I thought it only necessary to keep on doing it. Plus, I need to get some stuff off my chest, in a informative and in no way depressing way….. hopefully.

A lots happened since …..*checks last blog date*…. October! That’s ages ago, wow. Yeah, a lots happened. Christmas, New Years and Valentines Day. Its been a while.

She gave me beer. love at first sight...

In November, I met up with someone I’ll call Barmaid Girl. I chatted her up over the bar in the pub which she worked in, which is very unlike me. She was a bit unsure at first because of the age difference (9 years younger no less). We went out a couple of weeks and ended it soon after due to her being immature and plus we had nothing in common. We broke it off early December and that was that.

I spent Christmas with Kallam (my son) at my ex’s place while my ex went out to parties and so on. I wouldn’t miss his Christmas for the world.

Just after Christmas I received a message from someone (I shall name Blondie), who stated she had liked my profile and wanted to get to know me better. Curious and curiouser. We chatted and it turned out from the chats, she was alright to get on with. So after a bit of time, around Boxing day we decided to meet up.

We decided to meet up at a local pub which held a pub quiz. Its fair to say things didn’t go to plan from the start. She sat at a table next to the front door of the pub and being winter, we both were freezing and had people brushing past us on either side. It annoyed me an made me uncomfortable on top of me being my shy old self. I’m not a date person, having only going on dates once or twice in the past. I lapsed into silence having had difficulty talking to her, being shy herself. She was really pretty and sexy and that made me shy. She took it as me being ignorant and mean, so come the end of the night I found myself apologizing to her as she showed quite visibly that she was upset. Good start…. Yeah right.

We talked afterwards and decided another date was needed. My confidence was lower the second time round having been frustrated at the outcome of the last. The next one was with friends though and I was considerably more relaxed. Disaster struck though when, towards the end of the night, having had difficulties talking to her asked for her to join me outside to talk, but she didn’t follow. So I waited outside thinking she’ll come eventually. Turns out she just took it the wrong way and went off crying. Strange.

Things went fine for a while, went out a few times and she gave me more chances after making me admit it was all my fault after loads of arguments with me trying to defend myself. Disaster struck again though when we had a big argument out at another pub where she complained all the time about the way I acted and how I should treat her differently then how I treat friends. In some ways this is true, but the stuff I was doing, I wouldn’t have thought it was a big of a deal. Stranger still…. After changing to another pub, she excused herself and came back totally calm, flirty and friendly. That had me confused and freaked out. She also nit picked at little habits I didn’t even know I had. Id have given up sooner, but something just made me want to keep on trying.

We broke it off eventually when after loads more arguments we decided we weren’t meant to be and that we should go our separate ways. I was glad to be single again after such a hard time and confidence draining time. The sex was great and some times together were happy, on the whole we had to call it quits.

So here I am single, and what have I learnt. Even the most beautiful women can be bitches. Nuff said. So I’m on the leisure.

That’s basically the whole update. I’ll update more frequent in the days/weeks to come.

Good Mood Calls for Good Change

2009-10-16T11:49:00.000+01:00

Recently, I’ve been feeling good. No, I haven’t been taking drugs, meds or cannabis, but its a natural high. I feel refreshed and rejuvenated as if I’m seeing the world through new eyes. I know it sounds all over dramatic, but honestly, its how I feel at the mo. I feel like breaking out into song....”aint no stoppin us now, we on the move!”

I’ve been asking myself why I’m happy (its a strange thing to question ones happiness: I’m strange, so therefore, I do this). I’ve narrowed it down to getting a load of compliments lately of a few girls I know, talking again to an old friend who I haven’t talked to in a while, my hard rockin friend Kate being back from hols and hanging out, getting loads of praises and good comments regarding Kallam in nursery (beaming with pride)

To go with this new outlook I think I’m gonna treat myself to some new clothes from the Trafford Centre. I kinda know the look I’m going for, but whether I’ll actually pull it off is another thing. ...

The only things to put a downer on my current mood are the guy being sick constantly next door at all hours of the day... Seriously, is he bulimic or something?? Having no money till next week and feeing myself of a night as theres no gas and all the food I have is oven friendly.... grrr

That’s all for the time being. Tempus Fugit

nighttime antics

2009-10-09T11:39:00.000+01:00

I have an overactive imagination... This is partly the reason why I was tip toeing round my darkened unused living room with poster tube in hand coiled like a lethal snake ready to pounce on anyone who should jump out and go boo!. I heard noises from upstairs.... this could have been in my mind. Nevertheless, I spent a thorough 2 minutes checking around and switching all the lights on afterward to confirm that no one was indeed in the house apart from myself. I had my hands full of washing as I went back to my room and tried to turn the light on with my forehead...... it was a dimmer turn switch and I still have the mark now.... I need to chill more. Welcome to the life of Mal. Whoever I find as a companion in life will have to put up with me being a doofus because thats who I am. Makes life more interesting ay. lol

I wanna tattoo, this year more then ever. I discussed this amongst other things with Sarah (a good friend & blog buddy) and its one of those things, where you are anxious about getting one, but when you talk about it more and more, you get psyched up to get one and I really want one. The picture to the right is sort of what I’m after. Better quality and basically showing a calm lion with cub representing me and Kallam. Now its just getting psyched up to get one even more and preferably having someone to go to a parlour with to spot me and cheer for me when I have it done.

Housemate Blues

2009-10-06T11:30:00.000+01:00

I really feel for my housemate........All he wanted was no ties fun and frolics with one or two girls/women: he made this perfectly clear from the start of their affair. Yet when he goes and calls it quits after them apparently wanting more then just sex and developing feelings, he gets the hang mans noose around his neck for this and they take it more then just to heart, they are properly depressed. As can be seen from multiple Facebook statuses ranging from ones showing their anger at him to ones wanting to slice of his genitalia and put it through a blender.

IMO he did nothing wrong: maybe he talked too much to them and got to know them, maybe he was there for them when things went wrong in their lives, or maybe he just gave them the idea just by being caring. One of these girls is a friend of mine and she took it quite badly. Ooooh, badly isn’t the word I’m looking for. she took it so badly that she’s moving from the neighbourhood and is going to live elsewhere. She’s a nice gal too, has a bubbly personality and is good looking. I’d have asked her out myself had it not been for the fact she has really low self esteem and seems to be putting herself down all the time. A girl with issues. The other one he was seeing on the side is a nice one too, has a bubbly personality and seemed to me one who would have been happy in a casual non relationship. Can’t always count on feelings staying out of the equation. Anyways, my housemates left town for a week to take a breather from all the mayhem, maybe its for the best.

Onto myself anyway now. My Houseparty went well, I got drunk and had fun. The entire amount of visitors seemed intent of cramming themselves in the kitchen, small as it was, so i joined them. My mate Adam showed us how bulb in a microwave party trick and I provided the tunes through my ps3. It rocked. Everyone said they had loads of fun thanks to some party beer drinking cards. lots of flirting went on and I can't remember any of it. It was one of "those nights".

The following morning was a sight and I left tidying up for another day and spent the day recovering. :P

I was told at the weekend, that the barmaid I asked out the previous weekend had been asking for me. I heard all this off my dad as she had been asking about how I am and that she was worried that I got the wrong end of the stick when she told me that she was only 18. It turns out it was more of an approval question then a statement. She thought I’d be against going out with someone that age. Its unknown territory for me, but anything’s worth a shot. Might be something there. I’ve asked my dad to try and get her number, as I’m unable to get to the pub after work. (I hate busses). Whether it’s on their list of priorities I don’t know. We’ll see.

I’m still working my way through Dan Browns book. It’s got me glued to it every lunchtime. It’s full of interesting facts, action and suspense. I’ll write a review when I get to the end.

Thats it for today. ciao

things that interest me this week....

2009-10-01T15:42:00.001+01:00

Things that have taken my interest this week:

1. Dan Brown’s The Lost Symbol.

Set to be another blockbuster, Dan Browns “The Lost Symbol” has already got critics buzzing over it. It’s definitely got me excited. I bought it on Tuesday and read it every lunchtime, and it has me addicted already. I’ve learnt some interesting facts about Washington DC and its history and the story, even after a couple of chapters is forming up well and has set the benchmark for the rest of the book. Its one of those books where you can’t wait to read it all, but know when you do, you’ll be upset as there are no pages left to read.

2. Flash Forward.

A new TV show thats out from the same US station that broadcasts LOST and other high budget shows. Its a sci fi one, so it has my interest piqued already. The story is where a majority of the population of the world has visions of the future 6 months ahead for about 2 minutes and the rest of the story is focused on a police officer trying to piece together his visions and others in an attempt to work out why everyone had the same experience. I’m going to eagerly await every episode of this one. I normally reserve judgement until a few episodes into the season, but this one seems good already.

3. Packages

Theres been four packages delivered that I’ve ordered at my previous address. I’m just interested in what they are out of what I’ve ordered.. Nothing major lol

4. Barmaid

I was interested in a barmaid at my dad’s local who seemed to have taken an interest in me. After plucking up enough courage, I asked her out and she seemed ok about it until she said she was 17. I recon it’d be wrong for me to date a 17 yr old, so I left it and so I go onto the next. :P Just goes to show my confidence is getting better if I can approach ppl easier now lol My approach in this instance was the shy but interested one where I looked down but did the cute looking up and saying that I fancied them :P It had her interest, but unfortunately, she wasn’t in my age range :P

5. “Malwarming”

A party, which technically isn’t a housewarming so my friends have decided to call it a Malwarming.... cute. Its on Saturday and hopefully should get a decent visitors list. My housemate wulfie said he knew someone who could bring Rock Band!!!! Awesome... will update you on how it goes...

much anticipated update ....

2009-09-30T11:56:00.000+01:00

Whilst I have some spare time in work (a rare thing indeed) I thought I’d return by popular demand.... (one person asked me to)

I miss blogging to be honest, its a full five minutes in life where I can plop down some thoughts and ramblings onto this white virtual paper and try to make sense of them instead of having them cooped up in my head like a metaphorical prison of thoughts, problems and dreams.

The main news of the month is that I’ve broken free of the parental abode and gotten myself a place of my own. It’s sharing a house with another guy, but its quite fun nonetheless. I’ve got independence now, which is what I wanted when living with my dad and his girlfriend. My room made nicknamed “Wulfie” is a strange one in my view, but he probably thinks the same of me with my eccentric and unusual ways of living, i.e. dancing around the house, spending time alone and loving it, my morning routine* etc. What I find weird about him is two fold: one.... his first appearance is intimidating (bulging eyes, strawberry blonde hair and a confident attitude), secondly he is indie mad and wants to be a mod. Nice....

The house in question wasn’t the epitome of cleanliness when I moved in. Dog hairs covered the floor as if some freaky hermit carpet, thigh bones seemed to be hidden here and there around the house, and the dishes were stacked up in mini skyscrapers. It’s all sorted now because Wulfie had taken it upon himself to clean up the place and I help out when needed too. So its a nice little bachelor pad and what’s best is it has Beatles pics all over the living room, which makes me feel right at home.

My dad the other day text me saying he missed me, which was nice and very not like him. Makes me think he really enjoyed my company, which was not evident among the nightly roasting sessions they had about me during their drinking fests.

Lesser major news is I gotz myself a PS3 and an Iphone, I now have all my gadgets of the year that I set out to get. Go me. I’m not materialistic, however much that seems. All these possessions are little consolation from actual social contact, which I’m pleased to say is coming along very well. Now that I live in the same town as my friends, they come round more often and I can go out for drinks with them (if I have money). Me and Wulfie have had guitar jamming sessions, which have been fun and had fun times listening to music. I hang around more now with Kate, whos is my rockin’ best mate. I go round hers sometimes for a movie, to rock out on guitar hero or a few drinks down the local. Good times.

To sum up the rest, work work work, I see Kallam of a weekend, which is still a great (hes walking now! ***SO PROUD*** and I see more of him. Hes turning out to be a brainy lil rugrat now, wanting to read books and copying words note perfect. And Im no less of a man to say he is just soooo cute. :P I’m in the process of arranging a “Malwarming” party, as named by my friends, because its not exactly a housewarming lol hopefully that should go well.

That’s it for now. Will update

Superdogs!

2009-07-30T11:07:00.000+01:00

It's amazing what you can rustle up when hungry and have limited ingredients. For instance, I was at my exs recently minding the kids and I needed to eat. I fed the kids with chicken, chips n beans but found out there wasn't enough for me :( so I explored the cupboards. I found chicken super noodles and hot dogs hmmmmm. They seemed to go well together at the time so I mixed in chopped hotdogs in and voilà!

Superdogs! Thought I'd share that with ya. No need to thank me.

Went and saw Harry potter at weekend. Wow. Best film of 2009, I kid you not. It had me entertained all the way through. Check it out. It has comedy, action, romance and more.

I've also watched ice age 3 which was cool, public enemies "go Johnny", and most films out at the mo.

Not been up to a lot myself lately, applies for my own place from the council hopefully I'll get a place soon after lying through my teeth on the application.

See ya soon

-- Post From My iPhone

Return or not to return

2009-07-23T12:16:00.000+01:00

Decisions, decisions. Not a major one but one nontheless. This decision is whether to return to blogging or not. I like it and find myself always returning to it, but lose interest quickly.

I might, we'll see. This iPhone app I downloaded makes it much easier, so maybe, just maybe.

Not done much as of late, same old. Work, xbox, tv, computer, gigs and clubs. Nothing really to report on. Might be going wales sometime in august with kal. So I'll report on that.

For now it's byeeee

-- Post From My iPhone

A long time coming....

2009-06-17T23:25:00.000+01:00

I'd be the first to admit that my attention span is like that of a child in a toy store.... I get into something and just like that *clicks his fingers*, hes bored and moves onto something else to satisfy his creative thirst.... Its annoying when you just can't find the right way to express this creativity.... This is part of the reason I gave up bloggin...

In the time between my last post and this one, I took up guitar again.... put it down.... tried keyboard.... put it down and then onto photography, which didn't last long either.... Frustrating to say the least. Back to blogging...

Its been an eventful month or so. I've been on a few dates, been to a major concert, walked miles and miles for charity and been on telly....In between all these events was just boring nights in on my xbox and computer... so I'll skip to the highlights... FF

The concert I mentioned was an Oasis concert in Heaton Park in Manchester, said to be one of their biggest concerts to date, but I doubt it. I'm sure somewhere along the lines they've had a bigger one. Anyways, I went with three other friends and it was set to be a full day of booze, good music and good times. It started off well, with me meeting my friends at the train station. Well.. apart from me panicing, as I always do, about what to take, whether I'll need everything apart from the kitchen sink. I was convinced in the end to just bring myself and money. Some git who we went with, a big headed twit (I didn't bother remembering his name) took every opportunity to make me the butt of all his jokes.. I took them all on the chin, but secretly wanted to maim him.

We got there and waited, along with 70,000 plus people to enter the park. We were some of the first to gain entry and as a result got a extra special yellow band to let us into the front of the concert area. Judging by the size of the concert, I was told later on this was not easy and I felt quite good about it later on. We got there and proceeded to the front where there was litte room to set camp, but we made do litterally sitting on a few other concert goers to get a good spec. The beer at the place was over £3, that put the biggest dent in my wallet that day. I must have had over 15 pints, so thats like £45 wasted on beer lol

On first was Reverand and the Makers, a nifty band from Manchester I think and then Kasabian was on from Leicester. They both rocked and we had a merry ole time. Oasis though, was what we came for. By the time they came on it was 9pm, and we had been there since 1pm. The time had come.... They started playing Rock N Roll Star..... but then STOPPED! we were like "wha??". They stormed offstage and left us all to wonder what happened. We waited about an hour for a reappearance greated with messages on the screens saying there were problems with the generators. They eventually came back on and said it was a free concert for everyone... FREE CONCERT did i hear you say? yup a free concert. We were all over the moon. Not only did we get a full days worth of good concert, but it was free! SCORE!. lol All in all a good day I'd say. I've sent my ticket off for a refund and should be receiving it shortly.

The being on telly.... well that was just a few seconds on a local news show. Take a look below 0.29 seconds into the vid. I'm the one with the black n white striped top singing with his friends Champagne Supernova.... how cool?

Apart from that really good concert. I went on a few dates. One lasted more then one day, which I was made up with, but at the end of it all, she wanted to just be friends. Fair play. We met while I was out on the town with my usual drinking bud James and a new addition Chris, who is from Runcorn, a neighbouring town. We met some girls and had a good laugh, at James expense too. We called him Stifler, because he just acts too desperately when drunk, which i found out when looking at him from off the dancefloor. lol Maybe thats why i've been unlucky pulling in the past dancing around with James... i dunno. Anyways, we swapped numbers at the end of the night and agreed to meet up a few days later. We met up in a nice bar in town called the Imperial and had a good conversation and I was a good listener and stuff. Maybe I wasn't her type... with her being a sylisimo hair stylist and me just being a grungy rocker.. I dunno. She text me the next day, that she just wanted to be friends (translated as, we probably wont see each other again) great lol

Onto the charity walk, it was from Whitchurch to Bickerton.... some unknown countryside villages 15 miles apart. The day was fun but painful... I saw some amazing views and had a laugh with work colleagues. But its safe to say I won't be doing anything like that again for a while.. lol

update-ma-blog

2009-05-17T23:43:00.000+01:00

I'd like to say I don't have enough time to blog but that would be a lie. I have more to do in work now due to being given a new job role in the property side of our firm. More to do, more responsibility and more chance to shine and show what I'm worth. I did most of my bloggin in work, so its thrown me off blogging a bit. So for now I'll do mini ones every now and then and see how that goes.

The weekend started well. I went a friends birthday party in Runcorn, a neighbouring town. Had laughs, got drunk stayed up till 3am. Unfortunately I got carried away and I had Kal the next day. I got two hours sleep. I thought the babysitter would have gotten up with Kal, but nooo, she called for me when Kal woke up. lol I spent the day being zombie mal, but did my daddy duty and had fun with Kal. I got home all tired and really exhausted when my friend calls and asks if we both can go out. It was his last chance to go out for two weeks as he was going up to scotland. So i agreed. Didnt have a good night at all. I may pack in going "clubbing" from now on. Its the same story every time. I see someone, or many I like, i work myself up for not having the courage to approach and end up just knocking the drinks back and maybe having a dance towards the end of the night. Safe to say, I got off early and went home.

The online dating aspect of my life is uneventful. I message others, I get no response. Maybe thats because I only use the free ones? I may invest in a subscription one, maybe the king of all dating sites, Match.com. ... i dunno. There was one who messaged me not so long back, but after a few convos, I found her to be depressing and desperate. She complained in every convo, asking why no one likes her and the odd remark about myself like "i wouldn't say no" and asking personal questions. I blocked her after giving her a chance to redeem herself and I'm continuing on my pursuit of love. Will keep you updated.

Recently I watched, Star Trek, Wolverine and Angels and Demons.

Star Trek was really good. A good spin on an old story. Action galore, good acting and good storyline. I enjoyed it a lot. I'm not a trekkie per say but I do enjoy star trek a lot and it was good to see a movie like that. I love JJ Abrams works (lost, Fringe, Cloverfield, and now this) It seems he can't do wrong on my opinion.

Wolverine was really good also, but I only watched the infamous Workprint version going around the internet. Its the full film but without complete CGI. I still enjoyed it, but wouldn't mind seeing it in its entirety.

Angels and Demons was the most recent film I saw.... It had me really upset. Nothing like the book, which I so enjoyed. Ron "happy days" Howard took out a main character, Vittorias boss from CERN, who ends up being the main villain. He changed the whole story. I was not a happy chappy. The action was good though, and Hanks did a good job. However, I'd like to have seen the nerdy reporter from the BBC in the film, or the original ending. He ruined the Da Vinci Code and now hes gone and ruins this film too. Grrr.

Thats all for now. Will try and update often. Ciao!

The Long Weekend

2009-05-05T09:45:00.000+01:00

Awww, blog, listen I'm sorry for neglecting you. Look at you, you are all withered and suffering from withdrawl symptoms. I'm back with an update to ressurect you. Sorry, I've been busy. Forgive me?

The weekend was a long one. I took off most of last week because I was asked to mind my son and my ex's son for her overnight mid-week while she went to see Pink in concert in Liverpool. Being the good natured fella I am, I agreed to help out. I originally booked off Wednesday and Thursday, but booked off Friday as well because whats the point in going into work for one day?

I had them overnight without so much of a cry, which involved me taking Rhys, her son to school on both days, which was cool. On the Thursday, I picked him up and we went the park afterwards and had a game of football.

Friday, I spent mostly playing Call of Duty: World at War. Addictive, Much! lol As with most games, I completed it on a few difficulty levels and wanted more. So curiosity made me try the multiplayer aspect of the game and Voila! It let me on even though I had not purchased a membership. I'm still a bit hesitant about it. Free? surely not. When I had Call of Duty 4 I had to pay full membership to go on it. Weird. I ain't complaining. I've been on the multiplayer now every spare second and have ranked up quite well to level 30, Sgt commander I think. I have once again developed a short fuse when teen americans/british whining kids start making stupid noises and stuff and also though getting killed quickly by snipers. grrr I'm doing well though, winning the war and battling on through lol

Saturday came and didn't do anything but CoD all day until around 5.30, when me and a friend set off to see The Fray live!. I know amazing right. It all started off well. I had written the directions down and had my navigating head on with high hopes that we wouldn't get lost. Only my friend had his independant-navigating-know-the-right-way head on and we got lost. We overshot our destination by a few miles and had to stop for directions a few times. An hour or so later, we got there and queued for a while before they let us in. It was an impressive venue I must admit, not the best I've seen though. We were amongst the first 50 to get into the place so we were quite close to the front. I had high hopes that my view wouldn't be obstructed by any gits or git-esses, but as soon as the opening act came on, said gits and git-esses started to side shuffle right in front of me. It tested my patience. I had to keep reminding myself that there are probably a dozen height impaired people behind me trying to see over my head to see the band.

The night went on and The Fray came on. Wasn't the rock n roll atmosphere that I'm used to but I enjoyed their set loads. The combination of vocal, guitar and piano talents from the lead singer, Issac Slade made the band what they were and he didn't let us down on the night. Overall, it was a brill night and I'd definately see them again.

I was hurting the next day from all the standing and stuff, and I felt as though I had the beginning signs of the man-flu coming on (still feel like crap). So I spent most of the day in sipping lemsips and avoiding contact with anyone. That night, I felt better so I went to a friend's party that I was invited to. I got there and was told that they'd be bringing Rock Band with all the instrument controllers!

The host of the party, Dave said that we were all going to be split into bands of three people. I naturally opted to play guitar every single time, but as the night went on I tired the singing. It went bad.... They chose Rio by Duran Duran for me to sing lol It was funny to say the least. I was more at home singing Red Hot Chilli Peppers - Slow (hey oh) and other songs that were more of a lower key. The highlight of the Rock Band experience was hearing people sing Pretty Fly for a White Guy by The Offspring (yes... even me). "give it to me baby, uh uh uh uh!". lol I loved seeing my old friends again and had a great time and even had one those philsophical conversaitons you have in the early morning when drinking about random insignificant stuff lol.

And on our Bank Holiday Monday, I spent it on CoD. Thats my big weekend in a bag. I'll probably be on CoD tonight too. Its addictive lol See ya.

Too much info can be a bad thing.

2009-04-28T12:01:00.017+01:00

Theres me worrying about my own problems when something major is happening all over the world. Swine Flue. Well I'm certainly paranoid, scared and freaking out at the moment.... mostly due to the scaremongering that is being created through the media regarding Swine Flu. This is what the papers have said recently....

Health officials learned over the weekend that more than 1,600 people in Mexico are possibly infected with the swine flu virus. With the first confirmed case in Spain, the disease has hit European shores. And the tally of confirmed swine flu cases in the United States has now hit 40, according to a statement by the World Health Organization on Monday. Health officials have warned that this number is likely to rise.

Papers and the news state that this pandemic could rival or exceed that of the 1918 pandemic where researchers estimated that 21.5 million people died as a result.

Amonst other things, my curiosity got the best of me and now I'm looking at the life feed of the spread of the outbreak via Google Maps, as shown below. I'm now quesitonning my own sniffles and coughs... I hope that we are all safe at the end of the day, I hope to god we all are. I am probably overreacting, but the facts are scary.

The flu is a mutated case of flu that infect pigs. .... Why Babe? How can you give us this deadly mutated flu!

View H1N1 Swine Flu in a larger map
Pink markers are suspect Purple markers are confirmed or probable Deaths lack a dot in marker

Yellow markers are negative

The experts say there are everyday actions people can take to stay healthy.

Cover your nose and mouth with a tissue when you cough or sneeze. Throw the tissue in the trash after you use it.

Wash your hands often with soap and water, especially after you cough or sneeze. Alcohol-based hands cleaners are also effective.

Avoid touching your eyes, nose or mouth. Germs spread that way.

Try to avoid close contact with sick people

Influenza is thought to spread mainly person-to-person through coughing or sneezing of infected people.

If you get sick, CDC recommends that you stay home from work or school and limit contact with others to keep from infecting them. I'm sorry if I've freaked you out in the process, I didn't mean to, but hopefully, you'll see why I'm concerned regarding this outbreak. I sincerely hope no one catches it.

Musical Monday

2009-04-27T10:02:00.000+01:00

OMG how great is Rock Band 2. Addicted much. There was me thinking Guitar Hero was the shiz, but then I decide to buy Rock Band and it’s twice as entertaining and loads more songs. Shame I only have it on the ps2 at the moment and not on the Xbox 360 where I could have shared my achievements and show off my guitar shredding skills. Over the weekend to keep me entertained and happy I’ve been playing along to songs such as Livin on a Prayer, Everlong, The Middle and White Wedding no less. I even sing along, now that’s rock n roll...... or sad, depends on how you look at it. Lol I’m currently working my way through the hard difficulty and might even set about mastering Expert, but after nearly breaking a finger trying to play Metalica’s Battery, I think I’ll just give that a miss.

Anyways, seeing as its musical Monday, I might as well share another song that has meant something to me from my past. This week’s song is Everlong by Foo Fighters.

The reasons why I chose Everlong, firstly is well because the Foo Fighters rock, secondly it reminds me of when I went to see them live last year. Wow that was a night to remember. When Dave Grohl stopped messing about as he normally does with his goofy humour (which is one of the reasons why he ranks so highly in my fave celeb list) he started playing Everlong while on his own seemingly floating above the crowd on the runway type thing that extended from the stage into the crowd. The entire stadium fell silent as he played the intro and the atmosphere was electric. When the chorus came about though everyone was rocking out and it was amazing. The song itself is amazing. One of my favourites in fact and I thought I would share it with you lot.

To my weekend update....

Nothing much happened over the weekend apart from having Kallam during the day, which went great as usual and going out on Saturday night.

Me and Kallam spent Saturday at my sisters, which would have been good if not for the tension that fills that house whenever I go. This is due to my sis and her husband always falling out. It’s like one big massive argument that has lasted for years and doesn’t seem to be getting any better. They drink to drown their sorrows, end up fighting most nights and are caught up in what looks like a destructive cycle of anger, tension and depression. Wish I could help really, as its hard seeing my sister go through it all. I’ve tried to give advice, but she will not listen. She said to me this weekend that she is going to be getting a place of her own soon and getting a legal separation. Maybe that is for the best. It’s not nice to spend time there when my sis is trying to put as much distance between herself and her husband causing friction and tension. I probably won’t go there again. It’s very uncomfortable and tense.

Saturday night came and I was glad to be out of the house and party on down without a worry in the world. Things didn’t go to plan though. We got into town early and most of the places were only just opening so we went to a pub which was fairly lively and set about getting drinks in. We hit the beer hard and when it came to going to the other bars in town, I was feeling sick and just not in the mood at all. Feeling sick and eating myself up inside like I normally do when my confidence gets in the way and not approaching anyone, I just was depressed.

There were many girls/women I could have approached a few who looked approachable, but something within was holding me back. Fear of rejection maybe. I get stroppy when I drink if things don’t go to plan I now see when looking back. I don't realise it at the time. I need to stop thinking the girls will approach me, as that just doesn’t happen. They wait for you to go to them. So, instead of just standing there gawping at any girls that walk past, I’m going to approach some next time and make an effort. It’s the only way to defeat my inner demons. At the end of the night, I had a dance with a few, but by then I just wasn’t in the mood so I told my friend and we got off in a taxi still feeling sick and depressed.

As usual, I got over it fairly fast the following morning with other things to think about; the boring day ahead, my head which was banging like a bass drum and the need for coffee. Its only when looking back at how crap I am on a night out that I pity myself and want to set about getting out of this phase. When I look deeper into myself I am unable to just have fun on a night out and seem to want a more serious thing, which I need to stop doing. I asked someone out that I met a week back and she said that she was only looking for fun having gotten out of a major relationship so I left it. Met her again on sat night and because I was still sulking majorly, I declined to dance with her and I feel really bad for it now. *sighs*. I’m just hopeless.

That’s my rant for today....god I went on a bit didn’t I lol Thats what blogs are for though ay. Now I'm working for the weekend again and I am looking forward to going to see The Fray with my good friend Sarah. Fun times.

Eight Things

2009-04-24T09:29:00.000+01:00

I was tagged recently by a close friend blogger ♥♥♥ The Girl of Make Believe ♥♥♥ to do this meme. Check her blog out as its really good.

Eight things I look forward to:
1) Renting my own place and becoming independant.
2) Finding "the one". The single life sucks
3) Seeing my son every weekend.
4) The possibility of going on holiday to Wales later this year
5) Seeing The Fray in two weeks
6) Seeing Oasis in June
7) The weekend - I need another good night out
8) Driving perhaps...

Eight things I did yesterday:
1) Went to Work
2) Had tea - a luverly chicken dinner made by my step mum
3) Checked out some trial glasses I ordered to see what they were like
4) Tried on some t-shirts I bought. Very cool
5) Played on my x-box - Mass Effect
6) Went on internet
7) Watched TV
8) Watched a film - Be Kind, Rewind

Eight things I wish I could do:
1) Mind Read - I'd love to know what people really think of me and stuffs lol
2) Not get so attached to people to soon
3) Have more confidence
4) Time Travel
5) Fly
6) Have the ability to have loads of career skills for a better job.
7) Wish I had the patience to learn something new without getting bored
8) Stop looking into things too much and take things as they are

Eight shows I watch:
1) LOST - what a good show...
2) Heroes
3) Smallville
4) Reaper
5) Dexter
6) The Inbetweeners
7) Eggheads
8) Weakest Link

Thanks for the tag, I enjoyed answering them. Now I tag:

Astharis from Breached Hotel

Chinkygirlmel

Emmie

Please Don't Eat With your Mouth Open

Feeling Fruity

2009-04-22T22:01:00.000+01:00

I've been a bit tired lately, lasting over the past few weeks. (could be why I've not blogged in a bit) What could be the cause? Well, I dunno. It could be as a result of lack of vitimins, as I don't eat fruits often and foodstufs containing vitimins..It could be that I have spent the last few nights concentrating solely on editing photographs I have taken recently, It could be that I don't exercise... ever lol or it could be that I am not getting enough sleep (staying up till past midnight and then getting up at 8am the next day could be having an effect on me). Whatever the problem, I need to fix it. I may go to my doctors for a routine check up. The last one I had was in 1996.....I think... lol I know for a fact he won't say something like I'm going to die or anything, but I just put off going to the doctors maybe because my dad does. He is a traditional bloke, like when he gets a cold, he roughs it out and just will not see a doctor.

Anyways, enough rambling on about health problems and on with the update-i-mi-bob (i enjoy putting stuff like that at the end of words. It makes it sound all funny).

NOTE: My main highlight was naturally having Kallam for the day, but its best to put things in chronological order when updating. Plus, I'm feeling fruity today, so I may overexaggerate a tad....be warned.

I finished work on Friday with more excitement then a kid in a candy store. I was to meet a real celeb, my first one. That night, if things went well, I was to be meeting an ex-member of Oasis, nicknamed Bonehead. Who, you say? Most people didn't have a clue and only die-hard Oasis/music fans knew who he was. Mr Bonehead, Mr Paul Arthurs as I now know him to be, was to be showing up in a nearby town, Runcorn with his new band Vortex. Yipee! So I headed along over the Mersey to meet up with friends with my camera in hand to get some band shots and hopefully to get an autograph.

I got there and there he was on stage sound checking... I went straight for my fellow Oasis fan, whos stage name is Dave Love (i know very gay), who is also in a band and we did the excited jumping stuff. I took a few pics of friends messing about and posing and then when the first band came on I went into photography mode. At the start, it wasn't that hard, but as the night progressed, I soon found that drinking alcohol when photographin caused me to snap random people who I thought looked funny, most of the shots were blurred and some were very close up lol I got a fair few decent ones though. I might sneak some links to the photographs on the bands myspaces and see if they pick up on them. Maybe I'll get a part time job from it.... wishfull thinking there ay. Got to do it. lol Below are some shots from the night I took.

Half way through the night, I ventured out into the back smoking area outside. Me and my friend Amy were doing the goofing around thing and squabbling over whether to approach Mr Head or not. Being drunk and full of courage, I walked over with purpose having gained enough courage through drinking and lightly tapped him on his shoulder with little regard that he was mid-conversation with a friend of his, possibly a roadie. Looking back, he seemed mildly irritated, but concented to providing me with two signatures no less and a photograph with Dave Love, who now cherishes the photo. Photographers will sympathise with me that we are alwys behind the camera and hardly ever get snapped, so I never got my photograph with Mr Head. *sad face*. I got the autographs though, which I'll undoubtedly lose lol.

I woke up on Saturday feeling way under par and thinking to myself, why oh why did I drink. That soon passed when I recollected the fun and good times of the night. I quickly got dress and set off to get Kallam. Two things that don't go well together is being in a hungover state and riding our local bus service number 79c. The 79c route is rollercoaster hell for hangoverees and goes along loads of twisty turny, vomit enducing roads. As the trip went on and on, I got dizzier, hotter, and stuff. Luckily, I managed to contain myself to the end of the journey and quickly departed the bus and round the back of a nearby bus stop for some alone time.... nice. After a quick trip to the shop for fruit juice and munchies, I felt right as rain again and made my way to collect Kallam.

We had a great day. I took him to get his mop top cut, which again he behaved so well, the hair dressers were shocked and I was soooo proud lol Then again, I think Kallam is just scared in them situatons as he wears the expression of a victim. As seen to the right. lol We then went to my dads for a bit and then onto a kids play area in town. Its possible that I am the most proud dad in the world when I'm with my son. He means the world to me and seeing him smile and just being around him fills me with joy and happiness. I took him back and then set off for home where I proceeded to relax and laze about before going out on Saturday with my friend James.

Saturday night went well, we met up at our other friend, Al's house and then went to the local boozer where we did the usual game of "drool and stare at any lady who walks by". I'm sure we've been spotted doing that many times, but none of us make an effort to approach anyone. We then headed off towards the more livlier places in town where we drunk shots, had a few laughs and towards the end of the night danced the night away. I must say hanging around with James has strengthened my confidence, because looking back a year ago, I wouldn't have had the confidence to go out on the town, let alone dance while out on the town. Not had any luck with the ladies yet, but given time I should be alright. Maybe its the glasses? I've ordered some trial ones to test out new looks, as its proven women while on a night out firstly look at the face and if its someone with glasses or something, they are put off. Sounds shallow, but it seems true.

No sign of a hangover on Sunday, and it basically consisted of relaxing, being lonley, seeking company with my pet dog Ivory and slobbing about. Then on with work, which brings me to today.

Hope you've enjojyed this blog as much as I enjoyed typing it.

Comic Book Me

2009-04-14T13:38:00.071+01:00

Firstly, a little observation. When on my way back to my normal office after covering at another one accross town. I came across a poor old fellow who had fallen and really badly hurt his head. I made the usual glance around when something like that enters your boring existance of a day, but I didn't linger as there were many people around....too many.

There were the caring middle aged ladies knelt besides him, the frantic middle aged men with cell phones calling for help stood nearby, there were the nosy parkers and happy ending folk who just want to see what will happen to this tragic story, and then theres the kids/teens who stand outside of the circle pointing and laughing amongst themselves... now that upsets me. I guess you could call them chavs, the type of kids who don the matching tracksuits and caps and ride small BMX bikes, the ones who drink cider and never go school...grr. I hate those types. I hope the gentleman was alright and got to hospital fast. My thoughts go out to him.

Heres a little comic I created over the past couple of days to pass the time using a comic social networking site called Pixton. Very handy and I may post a couple of comics on here as and when I feel like to get me back into the swing of blogging and for entertainment value. Its only an experiment and a mess around, so its only a made up story lol

My weekend went well. It was a bank holiday, so I had Friday and Monday off work. I was due to have Kallam and his brother overnight on Friday, so I went over early to spend some time with them before they went to bed. On Saturday, I took Kallam for his lunch at a nearby cafe and then to my dads where we played and spent time together. Its great to see my dad laughing and playing with Kallam at the weekend, as it seems like my dad is down most of the time. Kallam loves his grandad too.

I love this picture. Its a shot which shows them natrually having fun together.

(the hat is just a hat my dad got from a pub once, he doesn't wear it all the time lol)

On Saturday night, I went to a gig at a local. On stage were some friends I met not so long back who were in a band called Kessler. They are all in their 30s, but act in their early 20s and are very fun to hang around with. I felt quite sorry for them, because they had been asked to play at the local, but hardly anyone turned up, a mere 20 people no less. They played their extra long set consisting of classics from the 60s, 70s, and some modern tracks, which they call their crowd pleaser set and a really good cover of Katy Perry's Hot and Cold. It was a cool night.

Sunday and Monday I was dead to the world.... I played on xbox, watched tv and went on my computer. Hardly left my room. I hate times like that. Times where I don't feel like doing anything. In those days, I completed my newly aquired Tomb Raider Underworld and completed Dead Space... Now I have two useless games, because I hate playing games more then once... oh well. And now I'm part way through my working week. Roll on the weekend...lol

My Fave Things - April

2009-04-08T14:57:00.003+01:00

Each month, I'm going to post a list of my fave things and why. Hopefully, the list will vary with each month depending on what it is. Maybe I'll like it for months, but I doubt it. Inspiration for this list was taken from another blog and I thought it would be a good monthly feature. My blog updates at the bottom, if you are interested in my ~~doings~~ recent activities lol

My Fave Movie - The Butterfly Effect 3 - Revelations

I saw this film online not so long back and in rare good quality. It was a great film, with twist and turns and a good storyline to boot.

Check my review I did on my other blog The Movie P.I.

My Fave Album - Folie à Deux by Fall Out Boy

What an amazing album from those pop rock specialists Fall Out Boy. I've been listening to it a lot recently. Maybe its the powerful vocals of Patrick Stump thats got me hooked, or the catchy riffs... maybe its the lyrics that stand out for me. I don't know, but what I do know is that when listening to it, you'll find me singing along and air guitaring.

Songs like Americas Sweethearts and What a Catch, Donnie showcase the bands ability to change genre of music effortlessly and in some cases verges on showing off. You can't hold it against them though; if you have the talent, flaunt it.

My Fave TV Show - LOST

Who loves LOST? I do. Its definatley the thinking man/woman's show. I can't get enough of it. Its got time travel and loads of action, adventure, romance, twists and turns and great acting.

Its the best show around and no one can convince me otherwise.....nuff said.

My fave book - Labyrinth by Kate Mosse

No.... not the model, but the historical, action adventure, fiction author. I bet she gets that all the time lol

It wasn't the best book I've read ever, but this month, its the one that caught my eye. It involved two points of view from the outset, one of an Alais who was in 1680 Carcessone in France and one of an Alice who was in modern day France and follows both of their storys including a hunt to solve the mystery of the labyrinth and more. It had me hooked, which is more then I can say for some poor attempts at Dan Brown-esque books in the past that I have read, so alls good.

Website of the month - Digg.com

This site is a very handy tool for those wanting an update about anything without having to scrawl through an endless amount of websites to find what they want.

It has handy tabs which allows you to search any topic relating to science, entertainment, odd stuff (my fave), technology etc.

I always visit the main page to find any interesting news when I have nothing to do in work or wherever I am

My fave drink: Oasis Fruit juice

My fave meal: chips, peas and fish from the local chippy

Recent Events:

The weekend went fine, went to collect Kal on Sat from his mummys then went to McDonalds where we had lunch. He got a free balloon which, because of the wind, I had to run off to fetch much to Kal's amusement. We then went to my sisters where we played and had a mess around. My sister put some bets on the Grand National horse race, which Kal won! My sis put £1 on the winner which was 100/1 favorate, which meant Kal won £100, but had to give half to my sis for putting the bet on for him. I tried to be sly and said I gave her a pound for Kal, but she wouldn't have none of it. Can't blame me for trying lol

Sunday I stayed at my sisters all day and went to have our sunday lunch at a nice carvery that was local, an all you can eat carvery no less. I was back to work on Monday and thats how its been since then. Back to the boring routine

A Beatles Pic

2009-04-05T23:04:00.000+01:00

Heres a drawing I did when I was around 12 and the original photo is below that I drew. Thought I'd post it after finding it routing through my Beatles memorabilia I had to give to my niece Jud and thought I'd share with you all.

Hey Jude, Don't Make it Bad....

2009-04-03T12:59:00.002+01:00

My niece, Jud (16), god love her, has taken the first step in discovering Beatledom and is currently teaching herself about anything Beatles. It makes me so proud, being a big Beatles fan myself. It all came about when she chose to study the Beatles as an art project and has been looking through album covers and artwork done by Lennon and so on. She has now ventured into teaching herself all there is to know about them. Go her!

In steps good ole uncle Mal with his many books on the Beatles, including the sizable Anthology, which weighs a ton. She has asked for them so she will receive along with any info I can give her myself. Only last night she was asking about Lennon’s death, which she seems morbidly fascinated with lately and I answered what I could. She asked about Sean and Julian, Lennon’s sons and what they did after he died and whether McCartney made amends with Lennon before his death. I was happy to help out.

One thing that perturbed me was that she mentioned that she and her friend had been debating about who was better John Lennon or Kurt Cobain... What! I was flummoxed about why anyone would even side with Kurt when Lennon’s on the table too. There’s Lennon who had 20 years worth of performing and making a difference by trying to “give peace a chance”, whereas Cobain had a very short period in the limelight, most of it he spent being depressed and wasted. The Beatles influenced nearly all bands to follow for years and decades to come. Nirvana influenced some but not all bands and his death carries the most importance when remembering Nirvana. I could argue all day about it, but is it worth it?

Luckily Jud stuck up for Lennon and is carrying on debating for me against her friend. With my tid-bits of information given to Jud I hope to help her win. Out of interest... What are your views? Cobain or Lennon?

Thinking back to around 2001, I remember taking my first Beatles tour of Liverpool with Jud and my ex from TX who I was with at the time. I was 18 and Jud must have been around 7 ish. We struck a friendship with a shop owner from Matthew Street because we visited that area a lot around that time. He agreed to personally take us on a tour of all of the major Beatles landmarks. It’s a shame I don’t have any photographs. I took some good ones of Strawberry Fields and Penny Lane. It had a lasting impact on Jud and she still remembers it all to this day.

I myself have been a fan since I was 8 when my dad first let me listen to The Beatles’ Red Album compilation of all of their number ones and I was hooked from then on. I, like Jud took it upon myself to learn more and more. I have a few LPs, Hard Days Night and an untouched Sgt Peppers (unfortunately it is a reissue). I have the anthology Beatles book, which I’m going to lend to Jud plus all of their albums on CD. I did have my own website that I made on Homestead around when I was 18 called From Me 2 You, but it’s been deleted since.

That’s my Beatles history. Nothing to report on, lonely nights, watching TV, films and music, which is why I’m going over old ground again. It’s good to reminisce and I hope I’ve give you an insight into one of my interests. Thanks for reading.

Tic Tac tooooow!

2009-04-01T10:26:00.003+01:00

Thought all you visitors to my blog would enjoy a game of tic tac toe. I've programmed it so it cannot be beaten. Try it.

Highlight text below

I'm so cruel ain't I. April Fools! hahahaha!

I'm very much into practical jokes. Been doing them on unsuspecting family members and friends for a while now, but I've kinda stopped in recent years. I thought about putting cling film on the toilet this morning, but I'm sure my dad and his g/f wouldn't have appreciated it. There was always salt in the sugar pot, but nah, I would have only got a really good shout at for all my efforts. What I needed was someone my age who I could have scared the be-jesus out of. The funniest prank I scared on was one that actually backfired. I was hid in a laundry basket when I was around 8 years old and my sister was walking past. I jumped up so hard out of it that I fell out of it and cracked my head on the sink. Safe to say my sister was scared, and later on scared for me, who by that time was nearly unconcious lol

Referring to my previous blog post, I think I'll stay with Blogger. I found a part of blogger that helps me post more accurately called Blogger In Draft. I think its a way for them to test prototype features before they put them in regular blogger, I'm not sure, but I like it and its convinced me to stay. Go me. I have still been working on the header for the blog, but I keep getting sidetracked by doing designs like the one to the right.

I could do much better then this and its frustrating that my mood allows me to settle for something less then perfection. I get really frustrated when I don't have the motivation to do stuff I normally do. My horoscope mentions something about my creative cycle coming to an end, maybe that has something to do with it.

A creative cycle is coming to an end, so it's a good idea to finish up old business prior to starting something new. Be careful, though, as it's easy for you to overlook what's really happening because you want to have an optimistic outlook. But being eager for success is not a good reason to idealize the current situation. You will be best served now by seeing things as they truly are and not as you would like to see them.

I'm not a strong beleiver in many horoscopes, but the one I normally look at hits the nail on the head on most days and often has things I can relate to in them. I get this one from Tarot.com, which has a widget on my goodle (my way of saying google) homepage.

Speaking of goodle, I have been addicted to the program Google Earth. Its an awsome program where you can visit and learn about places around the world, complete with 3d buildings and street view. Its like a suped up version of the browers google maps. I was exploring Liverpool, being a newly visited city by the google team and I was amazed by the detail. Below is a pic of the 3d model of Liverpools Liver Buildings.

Plus if you look long enough, you can catch some candid moments like this one of some tourist kissing one of the city's Superlambananas. Whether it was done for the Google team, I don't know, but I wouldn'd be suprised if they did it just for their own photo colleciton lol

Battle of the Blogs

2009-03-30T10:24:00.003+01:00

I've been getting bored of Blogger lately. Its been frustrating posting blogs in the level of quality I want. The WYSIWYG editor doesn't always translate what I type in the screen itno HTML properly for some reason (line breaks and basic formatting).

That being the case, I ventured towards the Wordpress website.....

I havn't made my mind up yet, but it seems organised enough and has some benefits, but something just ain't right... its like walking into familiar terratory, like your living room and seeing everything too organised as if a cleaner with OCD has moved everything around and taken some stuff for herself. I'm not sure I like it, but.... i'll give it a go for a post or two to see what it is like overall. Give it thorough going over with a toothcomb and I will let you know what I discover.

You will see I've changed my title to Laid Back Lion. I also got bored with my original title, Life Without an Instruction Book. The meaning was lost on me, mostly because no one really has an instruction book anyway, we all just ride through life making our own in our head. Laid Back Lion, means something to me however. I'm a leo, I like looking at lions in general and I'm very laid back. I could have chosen the word lazy which would have been more apt, but that would just be putting myself down and I've done enough of that in the past. I would like your views on the new title if possible. Going to work on a new header for either here or wordpress, depends which one I choose.

Last weekend went fine, I went out Friday night to a gig. It was meant to be a few bands on that night, but only two turned up. One being a band I follow on and off, The Loves. I got there, paid £5 to get in and mingled with friends, the band came on, I had a bit of a dance and all was well. Thing is by the time I had to leave, only one band had been on and I had paid £5 to get in. Scandellous! I was a bit cheesed off and stormed off later in the night to get a taxi home.

Had my son on Saturday, went to a children's play creche called Sues Madhouse. Felt weird sitting with loads of mothers and their children. It seemed I was outnumered and could see the eyes drilling into my whenever I went and played with him in the toddlers area. It was a fun day nevertheless and my son seemed to enjoy himself.

Sunday came and I just lazed around all day, playing on my Xbox. I rented a game a few days back, Left 4 Dead, which is a zombie, survival, horror, make your nerves go on edge, kinda game. Thought I would give it ago seeing as though a fellow blogger Xbox Maven suggested I give it a go. I actually enjoy it. I think I'd enjoy it more if I had gold membersip and could play online, but unfortunately, I ain't. I might fork out some money to play online seeing as though I've done everything a single player can do, not sure I would be any good though.I keep getting pounced on by hunters or I am always face to face with the big tank monsters... lol I'm always stealing the medi packs. Good at headshots and bombs though thats a plus.

That brings me to today, which is a new week started and work work work... exciting stuff. Will update ya later

"You know this much is true"

2009-03-26T11:56:00.001Z

If you thought you'd had enough when they first came around, be warned Eighties pop group Spandau Ballet have put aside years of bad blood and court battles for a comeback tour to take place around Autumn.

Great, another pip from the past wants to earn more money by reforming. They follow suit from various bands, (Boyzone, Take That, Duran Duran, NKOTB, etc) who have decided to bleed their fame dry from the public like money leeches. Some are successful, like Take That who have managed to produce some very cool songs and have sell out gigs across the UK. The main questions are, does Spandau Ballet deserve a world tour? Were they that good to begin with? I can name two songs in total that stand out when thinking of Spandau (I won't again), True (1983) and Gold (1983), both which topped the charts, which was a really amazing thing to do back then in the time of ridicuous one hit wonders and cheesy dance songs.

Singer, Tony Hadley did not speak to brothers Gary and Martin Kemp for a number of years - but they have now set aside their differences. The last time fans saw the band together, they were facing off across a court room. Hadley, Norman and Keeble sued songwriter Gary Kemp for a £1 million share of the royalties, but lost. There followed years of acrimony in which they communicated solely through lawyers. Journalists at a press conference on HMS Belfast in London, the scene of a landmark early gig in 1980, were told there had been a gradual reconciliation between the bandmates over the last 18 months.

Whats funny is Hadley was quoted in 2007 in The Daily Express as saying: "I know you should never say never, and bands in the past have said hell would freeze over before they got back together, but in our case I think hell is frozen and we still wouldn't do it." He should have kept to his word in my view, but seeing as they are now reformed like some Spam alternative of music and everyone likes a good sing along to some of their songs *breaks out in a frenzy of singing True*, a circuit tour of the UK would have been more appropriate (keep it contained) then the world tour planned and only then at clubs and pub.

Wind of Change

2009-03-24T13:14:00.012Z

*Sings and imagines he is a classic rocker with long hair and with psychedelic clothes and leather pants*

"Take me to the magic of the moment
On a glory night
Where the children of tomorrow dream away
In the wind of change"

Needed to have a sing song there. I'm always singing, so thought why not sing in my blog. I love singing, especially to classic rock songs like that one Wind of Change by the Scorpions.

The song runs true with how I feel recently. Its windy out and peoples hair is blown all about like the rockers of yester year lol, but mostly I feel the time has come for a change. I need to find a new job.

I have been looking around a little bit at the local job search websites for any sign of a job that would be challenging and would keep me on my feet while I am earning more money then I already am. I saw one today that fits the bill. Here's what it said:

Job Title: Customer Service Representative

Wage: Up to 22k (I'm guessing per year, which is 10k then what I currently earn)

Hours: 40 hours per week - Monday to Friday - Between 8am - 6pm
Description: The role of Customer Service Representative requires a candidate to work in the Personal Care / Pharmaceutical sales sector. The ideal candidate will have strong skills and experience within a Customer Service field, but must also have strong administrative skills. Blah Blah Blah.

So, I've applied for it. This could be the change I need and that salary looks enticing. So firstly, i search for some tips on how to sell myself to this company and improved my resume to beef it out a bit. I sent an e-mail enclosing my resume and here's what I responded with:

I am writing in response to the job vacancy advised by (the company) for Customer Service Representative in (my hometown) and I would like to learn more about the vacancy.
I am a currently a legal administrative assistant with extensive experience in customer service, sales, administration and IT. I have over 10 years experience in having worked in call centres, legal firms and general office environments. In these roles, I was required to deal with incoming and outgoing telephone calls, deal with enquiries, meet deadlines, I was required in some cases to promote items for sale to customers and other general office duties.
I feel that my skills in administration, customer services, sales and IT would be an asset in this role.
Thank you for your time and consideration. I hope to have the opportunity to discuss the opening with you in person.

Its professional and well worded. So lets see if they are impressed by my knowledge and experience and lets how it goes. Fingers crossed folks

Musical Monday Moment.

2009-03-23T08:57:00.007Z

This week my song of choice is Pages by 3 Doors Down, an American rock band. The song rings out to me at the moment and thought I'd share the same with you guys. The lyrics are underneath for you to have a sing along.

Its been a week since I last posted anything. I did intend on posting more, and indeed I shall, It just takes time to get back into the swing of things. Maybe the key is doing more to report on lol

This weekend (the only time I had done something in the past week), started off well. I went out for a mini night out with my friend James and his brother Peter, checkin out the hotties as all men do single or taken lol Most of the night we were just watchin the telly in the bar, how sad were we. The conversation consisted of mainly sex and porn, because James has a filthy mind and i think hes been without for a while so it is all he can think about.

Saturday, i had the kids and took them to McDonalds and to a kids play group called Barmy Bears. The name describes the kids well, Barmy. I took Rhys, my step son and Kallam and they had mucho fun whilst tiring me out at the same time. Rhys had some accidents in his pants which was really stressful for me because every time he did, i had to collect Kallam and take him with us to change Rhys.... god i was all stressed thinking back. lol

Saturday night i went out for a proper night out. I was mucho tired so wasn't really in the mood to dance or anything, but James managed to pull me up on the dance floor whenever he needed a wolf in his pack to round the sheep on the dance floor. Its a good metaphor when witnessing how men dance around the girls in the bars we go to. I left James to it after a while not wanting to be a part of any of that, plus i can't dance. Might have been me being paranoid, but whenever i was near any girl, their friends shuffled away seeking hotties... With this running through my mind, i took a seat and observed from afar with a beer. James met this short psycho girl and introduced me. I say psycho because she tried dragging me onto the dance floor, complete with nails and had this thing about laying her hands on our faces and squeezing. Weird or what. The night was same as usual and in the end I decided to make an exit and told James I was going. He looked crestfallen as usual but understood.

Got home shortly after and got my key out, put it in the lock and turned. SNAP!. The key snapped. I freaked out and pounded on the door to be let in. My dad woke up thankfully. I started to think he wouldn't as every night he drinks himself into a coma with whiskey and vodka. I was glad to see my bed that night I tell ya.

Sunday was Mothers' Day and also my Mum's Birthday so me and my sister planned on visiting the cemetery that day. I wasn't hungover in the slightest so I was looking forward to taking a walk and visiting her grave. We got there and planted some flowers and a wind chime. It was good to see my brother had visited the day before and left a message from his family. I got a bit teary, either due to the wind or sadness, maybe a mixture of both. I made a couple of jokes to disguise that I was sad like, "Mum would have liked that you are using Cillit Bang to clean her grave, being a cleaner and all" lol Having visited and paid my respects, i felt better for it and happier. After that, I visited my sisters and chilled there for a bit before returning home. I showed my dad the picture I took of the gave and he had a long look at it, I thought he was going to cry or something, but instead he just passed my phoned back and said looks good. He doesn't show his feelings much, just drinks them away. Moreso lately because his partner Jan has gone up to Scotland to visit her Dad for a couple of weeks.

That brings us to today. What will this week hold? Probably same as usual, computer at work, computer at home, TV and bed. exciting times. I need something to happen, or maybe..... I need to make something happen? Any ideas?

See ya

Musical Monday

2009-03-16T14:01:00.005Z

Thought I’d get back into blog-mode by stealing an idea from a fellow blog buddy for a weekly themed post. Felt the right thing to do seeing as though I love all kinds of music ranging many decades.

The song I’ve chosen is Always with me, Always with you by Joe Satriani, one of the world’s best guitarists. This song was first released in 1987, as part of Mr. Satriani’s album, Surfing the Alien. Satriani is widely recognized as a highly advanced, technical rock guitarist, and has been described as a virtuoso. That’s not the reason I chose this song though.

The reason I chose the song is because it brings back memories from around 9 years ago when I was 18 years old. It was August 2000 and not long after I my mother died back in March of that year. The family, in an effort to stay close and to give us that escape from the house and hopefully, stop us grieving, went on holiday to Benidorm.

It was on one of our walks down to the beach that we stumbled across a bar called the Daytona which overlooked the beach. Inside, was a guy from Scotland, who flew over to Scotland to play guitar for holiday makers and earning some money in the process. So we sat and listened with some beer in the shade of the sweltering sun. He introduced his next cover, which was the song I mentioned above, and as he started, I sat mesmerised by the song. For the first time since March and the passing of my mother I felt at peace, looking to and fro from his effortless guitar playing and the calm beach with is in and out tide. I’ll always remember that time when I hear this song, and for that this song will always be on my playlist and never skipped. The song itself has become a dedication to my mother, who is, as the title says, Always with Me, Always with you.

It seemed quite adequate that I mention it now, with it being March and with three anniversaries occurring this month, my mother’s birthday, the date she died and mother’s day. It doesn’t get to me as much as it did back then, but I still get quite emotional and my attempts to not let emotions get to me start to falter. Things have been getting to me recently and have nearly broken down on several occasions. I’m not embarrassed to admit it, as I am not an overly masculine man who thinks feelings are for the weak.

Me and my sister plan to visit her grave next Sunday, to plant some flowers and clean it up generally. Regretfully, I don’t visit the grave much, as I am not religious and find talking to stone and earth does nothing for me. I do however find myself needing to remember what she looked like, as there are no photographs around the house whatsoever to remind us, which is sad in itself. I might find some photos and frame them to put in my room.

Another thing that had me thinking of the song and all those years ago was an old friend adding me on the wonderful Facebook. We were good friends during college around that time and I left college shortly after March 00 to do the grieving thing and lost touch with her and haven’t talked since, but for some strange reason, she chooses this month to add me and we’ve had some good nights reminiscing over them college days way back when. Time flies and times change, but the people remain the same.

I'm also in the process of planning on returning to Benidorm or somewhere on holiday with friends. I'm trying to pursuade them to go to Benidorm. Its cheap and maybe I can return to that bar where I heard the song in an attempt to bring back some memories looking out across the beach to the big blue sea. Fingers crossed

That’s it for now, have a good day wherever you are.

Discrimination

2009-03-03T09:16:00.016Z

Recently, it came to my attention that a cBeebies, childrens channel, presenter was getting a backlash from the parents of the children watching the channel because she scared their children. They say this is because she only has half of her right arm. Ridiculous!

Here is an extract from the first online article made regarding the issue:

"A disabled cBeebies presenter has been the victim of a disturbing campaign after parents complained that she was scaring toddlers.

They claimed that host Cerrie Burnell - who was born with one arm - is not suitable to appear on the digital children's channel.

But the decision to hire her has prompted a flurry of complaints to the BBC and on parenting message boards, with some of the posts on the CBeebies website becoming so vicious that they had to be removed.

Incredibly, one father said he wanted to ban his daughter from watching the channel because he feared it would give her nightmares.

Others claimed that they were forced to discuss difficult issues with their young children before they were ready."

My views are that those who are complaining are small minded and scrared by anything different. The age of 1 - 5 is a perfect age to discuss issues surrounding disabilities, just as you would describe people being black or white. Its a part of every day life. Children have been brought up with the lack of disabled presenters on television and grow up without any knowledge that there are diaabled people in this world and when they see them..... shock! horror!, they stand and stare thinking of them as something terrible and freaky.

My son was born with the same disability was Cerrie and this sort of response to her being on TV is terrible and makes me upset at people can say these things about somone with a disability. I sincerely hope that with Cerrie staying on this children's channel, it is a sign of better times to come and my son won't grow up in a world full of small minded people.

He is the most cheerful toddler I've met and hardly ever cries, he radiates happiness most of the day. To know that most definately he will be bullied at school, like Cerrie was makes me upset. I hope this is the start of something new and along with channels showing disability on them, I hope other channels too do not discriminate against showing disabled people so that everyday people will not discriminate themselves.

Thats that for now.

As for recent news regarding myself, not much has been happening really. I went out last friday had a quiet few drinks with my good friend James and had Kallam the next day and went to my sisters to chill and play. Then I went out on Saturday night and regretted it the next day big style. Spent most of Sunday hungover, so I didn't get much done. I do enjoy the occaisional drink, but maybe I'll stick to quiet drinks from now on lol

Be sure to check out my movie blog at http://moviepi.blogspot.com , which includes reviews, news and upcoming films. Cheers.

Stuck in the Mud

2009-02-19T09:14:00.006Z

I get so bored in work. I guess i'd be more happy in a creative job, photography, design, anythin other than this. This job feeds on your soul. Hense, my attempt at creating a hat for my little mascot Neville the Nut. I think its quite fetching......help!

Maybe I'm over-reacting. Its a cosy job, I sit around all day, just type letters and thats it. I'm in a warm office and the pay is better than average. I have the feeling lately that I simply can't stay in this job forever and maybe its time to move on.

On the other hand, I'm thinking its too late to enrol at college. I should seek advice on that point by someone at the local college to see what my possibilities are. I wouldn't mind learning photography or design, its a big risk and I not be able to pay my way like I do now. I guess I am not happy with big changes. I'll request another prospectus from the local place and see what they have on offer for how much. Thats another thing; for adults to enrol they need to pay in excess of £100 for any one course. It seems things are stacked against me on that front.

Another thing that has been weighing me down, moreso lately, is driving. Every morning and evening on my way to and from work, I have to look at all those happy drivers in their swank cars and wish that it was me. I would love to drive to be able to travel to pick up my son, go visiting people who live far away and more. But again, this comes with a big gamble. I pass all tests.....then what. I can't afford a proper car, even if I save for a year or somethin. I'm impatient and I would like a car the second I pass. This makes me put it off even more. I need motivation if I want to fulfill any of my long-term plans, which I seem to lack at the moment.

Life has been great lately apart from the two set backs above. I've been seeing my latest fling, who I shall call.......Shoe Girl....... the only name I can think of at the mo, as she loves shoes. :¬) We've been hanging out most nights and they have been great. Just what I need. Most of the time we listnen to tunes, watch films, but more importantly talk about random stuff. Good times. Shes going through confusing times at the moment and whichever path she chooses, I sincerely hope shes happy. Shes a great lass and with the amount of care and happiness she delivers out to others, she deserves some herself.

Payday is upcoming and I hope I can keep some money back to last me the month, which I seem to always have a problem in doing. I buy things, which I really shouldnt. I'm spoilt, I know. I need to buy things this month however. Glasses, a new coat, and shoes. Maybe some t-shirts and jeans. All of which shouldnt be a problem as I'm Mr Cheapskate and only buy bargain, discount clothes which look cool lol

Will update ya later.

The Clown Boutique,

2009-02-12T09:09:00.008Z

Yesterday night, me and my long time pal James went to the infamous Trafford Centre. I had agreed to be his shopping assistant for the night as he needed T-shirts, jeans and shoes. With that general idea of what he wanted..... we ventured forth to do what most men hate and break out into a sweaty panic doing....shop

We got there and all was well. We did the man thang and scoped the hotties (safe to say that there weren't any, but we scoped anyway). Whilst scoping we set off to circumnavigate the shopping complex. The first point of call was River Island, a trendy upper priced fashion emporium, which at first i was anxious to enter, with me being accustomed to cheap bargain stores like George and T J Hughes.

So we entered this marvelous shop of wonders and colours. I soon found out the colours were actually the clothes and the wonders were the thoughts that occurred to me saying "I wonder why anyone buys these weird clothes? hmmmm?". Any person suffering from epilepsy walking too fast past the racks and racks of clothes would indeed have a seizure frenzy. It turned out most mens stores were like this one. I found myself wanting to return to a trendy shop like Burtons, which sells more smart-casual clothes. A rock clothes store would have suited me down to the ground, but there wasn't one in sight...*sigh*

Exhibit 1

Clown pants......in the normal clothes section......not the night time PJ section...hmmm

In defence of this trendy store, there were some nifty tops and boxers (underwear). Namely, SUPERMAN boxers, i nearly had a geek-fit and there was a cool THUNDERCATS top which had me dancing on the spot with James giving me the evils for embarrassing him.

All in all though, every store was filled with stuff like...

Exhibit 2

Multi Coloured tops, with colours that seem to jump right out atcha!

and

Exhibit 3

Clown shoes that were actually on sale amongst perfectly decent shoes. shocking!

So, if i wanted to go into in depth analysing-ment-ism of this current "young generation", I'd safely say they are a bunch of clowns on parade. Why on gods earth haven't their parents, or grandparents for that matter, taught them what not to wear having already made those dreadful mistakes in the 60s, 70, and especially the 80s/early 90s.

Maybe I'm out of touch with the fashion these days, maybe i should move with the times and try this new approach to cool out. Yeah, think I'll buy myself a multi coloured t-shirt and have everyone bowing at my feet (mostly due to the seizures they will suffer from me prancing around with one). But yeah, I may test one out. Doubt I will at the end of the day, the prices were in the £20 region, and that was just for socks. Think I will stick with my cheap, bargain clothes. lol

What do you think? Trendy, or terrible? Swanky or Scary? Give us your views.

Damn Snow

2009-02-02T08:54:00.005Z

We don't get it much around there parts. I for one could do without it. I hate winter. It affects my arthritis (how old do i sound? Lol) kids on the way to work were throwing snowballs as if instinctively. I managed to dodge one little kid who was cheekier then most. So i got away unscathed. The snow, if anythin seems to be getting stronger. Why can't there be snow days here. 'works been called off mal you can go home!'. Bring on the summer and bring it on quick i say.

Pic of the week

2009-01-30T16:02:00.003Z

Found out how to post pics to my blog straight from my phone. This pic shows am example of how far my love of superhero movies goes lol i ain't a massive fan but like little bits like this.

Addicted

2009-01-28T13:52:00.002Z

I'm normally a man who resists temptation. Very well in fact. I am not an alcoholic, nor am I a serial smoker or gambler. I have very strong will power when it comes to vices such as those. Well, all except for gaming... Last week (pay day), I bought myself an Xbox 360 and GTA IV. Having played an Xbox before and having been amazed by the graphics and games, plus having loved every other GTA game previously, I just had to buy myself one.

I've been brought up on computers and as far back as I can remember, I can recall a computer being in our home. First one I remember was a Commedore and then my much loved Atari ST. Next came the more user friendly consoles that kicked this hobby into overdrive, the NES, the SNES, the Mega Drive. I had them all at some point and used to spend hours isolated in my room playing them. Even on holiday away from my much loved consoles, I found an arcade and got my fix there. I cried as a kid if I didn't get a chance to visit an arcade. It was the arcade I wanted, not the beach or tourist attractions. Looking back, yes, it was weird. I blame my sister and brother who got my hooked on gaming in the first place.

In my defence, I am not a huge gamer at the moment. The addiction seems to have gotten weary as I've gotten older, with responsibilities, relationships and maturity pushing it to the back of my mind, but I still love games. I think in work about playing GTA and other games, like Guitar Hero, which was my previous addiction. (rock on!). GTA seemed the perfect first game to buy for the Xbox, as it is almost as if it is a never ending game. Well worth the money.

That's enough of that. I'm getting the wild shakes just thinking of the next mission I am to undertake as Nico Belic, the character from GTA. .. well, not that bad, I am over exaggerating a tad.

The weekend went well. I went a gig on Friday and got drunk. It seems the usual thing now on a night out. The question that springs to mind is "Can I go out with friends and not get drunk, but drink at a steady pace and just enjoy myself?". I'm going to experiment on that one in the future. I don't like acting like a prat when out with friends, even though they get a laugh out of it.

Spent Saturday with Kallam and did the usual, went to my brothers. He is progressing his wording a little, saying things like bye bye and associating it with waving to people. I'm so proud. *beams with pride*. When someone says "your a big boy now!", he stretches his arms (arm) up and smiles. He's so cute. Love him to pieces.

This weekend coming up, I've got him overnight and then during Saturday. Can't wait.

That's it for the update. C ya round.

All About Mal

2009-01-20T19:55:00.001Z

Things you should probably know about me

Who is your favorite music artist, band, or performer?:	Many.... to name one: The Beatles
What is a movie you would watch on a first date?:	A rom com: something like 50 First Dates
Are you single or taken?:	single
What is your favorite color?:	Blue
What is a movie you would never watch on a first date?:	My Bloody Valentine 3D or any horror
How important is physical attraction to you?:	50%
Who is your favorite actor?:	Will Smith
What are your top 3 favorite songs?:	queen: killer queen Sam Sparo: Black n Gold Beatles: Let it be
What is your most notable quality?:	unique-ness
Who is your favorite actress?:	Eva Mendez: HOT! lol
What is something you would never say to your partner on a first date?:	Fancy a shag.
What is your favorite drink?:	Coffee
What are your 3 top favorite movies of all time?:	Back to the Future, Indiana Jones, Star Wars
What is your favorite food?:	Sunday Roast
If you could change something about yourself what would it be?:	my teeth
Where did you grow up?:	In my hometown of Widnes, Cheshire
How do you describe your personality?:	Straight out crazy
What makes you mad?:	hardly anything, but guys who are gits make me mad
If you were to die right now, where would you go?:	i'd like to cuddle with someone in particular, but anywhere really, as long as i was welcomed.
When you're alone, does it bother you?:	Mostly Not.
What is something you have that you know would attract the opposite sex?:	good personality....i hope and a nice bum??
What gets you irritated?:	Mr know it alls
Do you want kids?:	yes. i have one already: Kallam 15 months
What are your long-term goals?:	Get a place of my own, get driving, find someone special, live happily ever after.
What makes you happy?:	my son, friends and family
If you found out you had 24 hours to live, what would you do?:	probably kill myself. In the 24 hours i'd have probably worried myself to death anyway
What's the first thing you look for in a woman's character?:	how caring she is, sense of humour and how lloyal she is
What do you like?:	I like: Music Movies Games Designing LOVE Photography My son
Have you ever been arrested?:	no, and dont intend to
What is your political view?:	Let's all just do whatever the heck we want
What confuses you?:	women, but i like to think i understand them more then most
What are some unknown facts about you?:	i have arthurits in my left knee due to a footballing accident and it hinders me from walking properly.
What do you appreciate in other people?:	i appreciate people who are genuine and are not two faced
Besides her beauty, what is something a girl must have in order to spark your interest?:	an amazing personality, including a good sense of humour, outlook on life and lovingness about them.
Where would you like to spend your honey moon?:	A beach city.
What is a country that you would like to visit?:	Austrailia
If you could choose the ethnic race of your girlfriend what would it be?:	Any. Not like i am desperate or anythin :P
What are your favorite international foods?:	Pizza, Special Fried Rice, Lasagne, Spag Bol, Curry
Where were you born?:	Widnes, Cheshire, England, UK
What is your favorite CD, Album?:	Queens Greatest Hits
What is your claim to fame?:	I stood outside of Tommy Lee Jones House in San Antonio
What is your worst fear?:	Spiders! agh!

Click here to take this survey or find others at surveyspace.
Click here to create your own.

musical genius in the works?

2009-01-19T11:30:00.005Z

Urgh, I seem to go in and out of phases of wanting to blog. I don’t seem to be motivated to blog often, which is bad I must admit.

I’m going to make a conscious effort to write more blog entries and hopefully, make them more interesting starting from today and you’ll have plenty to good entries to read. Hopefully I’ll live up to my end of the bargain.

I’ve been wondering why it is that I take up a hobby and after a few weeks or months lose interest and fling the hobby to one side and go onto different things. I’m thinking its due to my creativity. Leos, like myself, are natural born creativity freaks. I love designing, playing guitar, singing, creative writing and all sorts, I just can’t seem to keep up one long enough to improve my skills, its frustrating.

From now on I’m going to keep my mind focused on one, maybe two, hobby/ies and see them through and see where they take me. At the moment I’ve been thinking of recording my own songs. I can play guitar, sing, play the odd note on a piano and have a good ear for music, so naturally I want to showcase my talent to friends and maybe a mass audience, either from blogging or MySpace or whatever. I’m thinking of downloading some audio software, getting my rusty old mic for now that I’ve had for over 10 years just until I buy a new one and do some covers of some songs I feel I can do. I’ve got my eye on a few tunes, namely some acoustic songs by some of my fave artist. I’ll decide later tonight which ones I want to cover. I found chords for Sweet Child o Mine by Guns and Roses, so I might do an acoustic version of that to start with. That should be fun. Wish me luck.

If my good friend Dave Hearn, who likes to be called Dave Love can make his own songs at home, i'm sure I can. Heres one of his songs called "Super Fuckin Man".

If you like this song, there are more songs of his on his myspace .

As for recent events, the weekend went by without anything interesting happening. I know boring. I had my son on Saturday, and took him over to my sisters. She was mad busy sorting a party out for my niece, who on Saturday turned 16. I felt really old, especially when my sis goes and puts pictures of her up around the house, some with me in them. It got me thinking how times flys. Only seems like yesterday when she was a toddler, learning to walk and talk. Got me thinking how I shouldn’t waste time and I should get out and do things and make an effort with making the most of life while I can. A little motivation would be appreciated, but where on earth can one find a life coach? Lol. (Saturday night and Sunday were uneventful.)

A friend, who I met online a while back, came forth and confessed to fancying me. Wayhey! Problem being, she’s seeing someone and she lives across the country. Just my luck. Someone comes out of the woodwork confessing that they fancy me and they are unavailable. It’s happened now a couple of times. Seems everyone I take an interest in or has an interest in me, is unavailable either due to distance or relationships. That’s what you get when you make friends online. It’s a great thing, the internet, but can get on your nerves with the long distance thing. So, she announced to me that she had fancied me for a while. I said I was glad she thinks that way, as it is a confidence boost, but that’s given me a mind job, as she is seeing someone and no way in hell am I going to be an affair kinda guy. I’ve got morals and principals to adhere to dontcha know. I’m going to suggest friendship is the best way to go for us.

That’s it for my update. See ya.

Hello New Year!

2009-01-08T13:57:00.002Z

Its 2009.. Who would have thought it? I'm a 90's kid and always will be. Never did I think towards this far into the future (even though my imagination has always been very wild and sci- fi).

The year has started off well, which is a good start indeed. I'm hoping with fingers and toes crossed, that this year will be one to remember, unlike last year which pretty much stank of old socks dipped in blended bad eggs. I split with my ex, which on one hand was a god send, but on the other I don't get to see my son as much as I'd like and I am back living with my parents. Not the worst off I could have been, but still bad.

Late 08 was a bad one for the family, which kind of makes 09 more of a new start. My sister had troubles at home and so did my dad and his girlfriend at New Years. Plus I had an accident Christmas Eve, where I damaged my dodgy knee again whilst being a drunken idiot and left me hobbling around ever since. I'm Only just getting over that one, but at least I never had to visit hospital or anything. Apart from that though, Christmas was great, I spent Christmas day with most of my family and had a great time.

I was stricken by anxiety recently, as the great UK recession hit my workplace. Many stores and firms within the UK have been affected by the recent recession and many employees have been made redundant as a result. I thought I was going to be one of the "R crowd" yesterday, but was relieved when nothing happened and my boss didn't provide me with my unemployment papers. My thoughts go out to those who have been made redundant however. These are hard times and many of my colleagues in work have been made unemployed, some of which have worked within my company for more years then myself. I wish them every success in the future and good luck with finding a job.

Now that I am quite sure my job is safe (but not totally sure....), I can start planning on improving my circumstances and making 09 a successful year for me. First things first. To feel good about myself, I need to get out of my parent's house, therefore, I've started to look for a modest one bed roomed apartment in the local area and hope that come pay day, I'll be able to afford one. Fingers crossed. The next part of my action plan is to then see about getting my driving lessons back on the road. Driving is something I will need when it comes to visiting friends, family and most importantly collecting and dropping off my son.

Back to the apartment hunting through... I've gotten myself all excited about the prospect of moving out, I'm dancing all over the show. I've recently seen one that's very "swank". I'm not getting my hopes up as anything that looks this good is normally not for real. As you can see below though, the apartments are situated on the River Mersey and have a brilliant view of the nearby bridge, which is a smaller version of the Sydney Harbour Bridge. The price is only £375 per month and it is fully furnished. I've requested more information on the apartment so watch this space.

It seems I'm back at the blogging game. I hope many people come to view my blog as I would like their opinion on goings on in my life. I may add a review every now and then to spice things up. See ya soon!

The joys of winter...

2008-12-08T08:54:00.008Z

I hate winter for obvious reasons. Namely:

1. the cold..
2. the fact that most are susceptible to catching a cold in the winter.
3. you have to buy more clothes to keep warm.
4. the gas bill sky rockets.
6. the cold...brrrrr

I much prefer spring/summer (apart from the bugs). I feel like I am coming down with a cold. It put it all down to the cold and a bad choice in footwear. I wear converses. They let the cold in real bad and I felt yesterday like my feet were in fact in blocks of ice. I’ve made a mental note now to wear my other trainers when going out. They are made out of the white leather stuff normal trainers are made out of and not material.

My weekend wasn’t bad in all honesty. It all kicked off on Thursday night. I went to a local bands gig and got wasted with friends and had a great time. Friday night came and it was a works night out. It was to be held at Formby Hall, an exclusive spa and golf resort. I enjoyed the night, which mainly consisted of a five course meal, followed by free champagne and a comedy act, which had me in stitches.

Before attending at the works Christmas gathering, I felt my confidence had come on leaps and bounds, but the first sight of mingling with other work colleagues, I went back to shy ole Mal, and just sat off on my own for some of the night. A few drinks later though, I was having good conversations with others. Overall it was a good night. I got back at 2am in the morning, and went straight to bed not before taking a pic of myself in my smart attire.

Later that day I awoke and went to collect my son, but as it was cold out, we stayed in. I had them overnight, as his mum, my ex was going out. She seems to be going out a lot lately and I’ll need to make a mental note to not agree to have them overnight as often. On the plus side though, she is paying me back some of the money she owes me bit by bit every weekend.

Sunday came and I had a great time with the kids through the day waiting for the ex to return to the house. As usual she took her time and I left hers at 3pm. I waited around for a bus for a long time being a Sunday and the cold got to me badly and later on I gradually felt worse for wear and sick. I couldn’t get the sleep properly as I was having violent shivering bouts and because of this my sore back really hurt. It has been hurting for a couple of days now. I’ve never felt anything like that. I was retching in pain and shivering really bad. I managed to get to sleep eventually after breathing deeply and the shivering subsided. This morning though, I have no energy at all and still feel bad, but I’ve made an effort to go into work. If it gets worse, I’ll ask for sick leave. Fingers crossed that I get over this quickly and it doesn’t worsen.

Apart from the doom and gloom I feel lately, the Christmas spirit has eventually caught up with me and I’ve been humming and singing Christmas songs around the house and in work. It’s contagious. I was tormenting my son and step son with repetitive OH OH OH!s and they did likewise. It was fun. I’ve made two Christmassy designs recently and I thought I’d share them with you good people.

Will update you all as to how I feel and what I get up to soon.

Smells Like Xmas Spirit

2008-12-01T13:37:00.008Z

Me (aged 5?) with my best friend at the time, Old St Nick

The time is almost upon us when we swap presents, reunite with family and friends and everyone seems to be happy. Yet still, I find it increasingly hard to get into the spirit of things.... maybe its because I am single again with no family of my own any more to come home to after work, or put decorations up, to see excitement in their faces every day.. it puts a dampener on things and is like a dark cloud hanging over my heart. As does thinking about those not so fortunate, those who are homeless, have no families, those who suffer from day to day with no jobs or homes. My thoughts go out to them.

I want my son Kallam to get everything I did as a child, plenty of toys and all the sweets he can eat. In many ways I was spoilt and got nearly everything I wanted as a child. I now appreciate the effort my parents put into giving me the latest toy I was into just to make me happy. Now I want to do the same for my son, especially with me not being around as much since me and my ex split up back in March. I've bought him something already, but will buy more just before Christmas when I get paid. On an afterthought though, I definately do not want him to be as spoilt as I was, not taking getting toys for granted and knowing he'll get anything he wishes. It will be something I will work out as time passes, i'm sure.

As for recent events, Its been same old i'm afraid. Not much to report on. This weekend however I was asked to go out on the town by a friend and he said he would give me £10. How could I refuse?! I went out into the misty cold night with my friends going from club to club and had a good night. Can't ask for more then that. The next day I had my son, Kallam and Rhys for the day and minded them over night to give my ex a break, as she has been having a bad time with her relationship and her dad, who is terminally ill. Its the least i could do. It was good to have them, but equally stressfull. We had a great time though and it was good to spend the next morning with them watching childrens cartoons and chilling feeling that I am the luckiest guy around for having just a brilliant son. He means the world to me.

I am approaching the end of a great book series called The Dark Tower by Stephen King. Its been my reader's digest for over a year now and i've been hooked. Its all building to a climax. To explain the story would take forever. Click the link above for a wiki on it though. What is good about it is that its basically a fantasy/western epic story, which is set in the future. It follows the main character's journey to save the universe from evil by reaching The Dark Tower. He is aided along the way by three people, who are from a parallel universe, who he trains up to be gunslingers like himself. I'm totally emmersed in it and I am enjoying it so much. It will be sad to put it down after reading it all. I hope there is not an anti climax at the end... I will write a review on the whole series soon.

That is it for now. I will write another blog in the not so distant future.

2008-11-04T09:39:00.006Z

Another much anticipated blog entry from me. (>>i created the pic to the leftt. Great innit :¬D)

Recently been feeling the need to move on with my life, get some motion going instead of being stationary at a pit stop with no engineers. The pit stop being my dad’s house. I started my adult life there moving out with my now ex, had a family and it all fell through and then with an emotional car crash of a heart I went back to my dad’s for a pit stop.

It never meant to be a permanent stay and after more than half a year, I think it’s time to move on. To where though? With property prices rising and rising, even property to let prices are sky high, checked one a couple of weeks back and the rent was unaffordable for me. I guess I should keep looking. Then there’s the cold empty loneliness that will be there whenever I go to this new accommodation. That in itself does not seem inviting. With living with my dad and his girlfriend, I at least have the company if needed. I seem to be wanting to move on but with nowhere to move on to. I will have to keep searching. Maybe it isn’t the right time yet. Maybe it will all happen in the new year. This year has not been kind to me at all and I want to leave it behind and start with 09 already. Sheesh lol

On a lighter note, Halloween came and went as fast as a speeding train and with it went memories of a good night with friends. I was invited to a good friend’s house for Halloween and they emphasised that it was fancy dress. So, I got to work on figuring out what to go as. I dismissed going as anything too predictable, e.g. a ghost, a vampire, the devil, Dale Winton and opted to go as something cool but still scary. I decided after a few days of intense pondering, to go as The Punisher. The Marvel character seemed ideal, with a big scary skull on his front, guns, a leather knee length coat and overall just seemed bad ass. I already had the leather coat, thanks to my dad buying one way back when and all I needed was the skull t-shirt.

Being the kind of laid back guy I am I left it to last minute and ordered one through play.com, but with two days to go to Halloween I was panicking. The costume all depended on this t-shirt. I decided to make my own just to be safe. I printed off the skull picture and enlarged it to A3 (twice the size of normal paper, not sure on US size of paper). Then I went and bought some thick white fabric. I cut out the skull logo and pinned it onto the fabric and cut out the skull. It turned out to be quite enjoyable and not as hard as I first thought. I then got my dad’s girlfriend to stitch it onto an old t shirt and the deed was done. The end product looked amazing. I felt accomplished and decided to wear the t-shirt no matter what, even if the t-shirt I ordered came in the post. (which it did yesterday – it looked below average compared to my home made one)

Halloween eventually turned up and I went straight after work to my friends house and chilled there for a bit and got dressed into my Halloween gear. They all commented on how bad ass it looked and I was well proud. The guests turned up one by one, their costumes ranging from The Hulk (painted green and ripped clothes lol I just had to laugh), a guy dressed in girls lingerie, and witches and devils. Unfortunately, my ex and her friend was there, but after a few drinks and staying in a different room I was the life of the party and had a laugh with those around me. I enjoyed it mucho.

The day after I was a bit worse for wear, but I pulled myself together after a few cups of coffee and a few bananas. I went to pick my son up and had a great day at my sisters. Hes getting to be a little cheeky now, grrring and smiling his face off. Gotta love him; he means the world to me and I can’t imagine life now without him. I could write a whole blog about how he makes my life worthwhile, or perhaps how his smile brightens my day, how proud of him I am, or maybe all these things. I however will not write these things, but will let them out occasionally in blog posts, as too much adoration can spoil things.

Sunday was spent going to see my nephew play rugby. (Thats him in black to the right fighting a losing battle of getting the ball past the opposition. I took many photos that day, most of which are in my facebook, so i cannot link to them unfortunately.) He has major potential, with enough encouragement to be a big league rugby star. He carries his team, tackling and scoring more than the others and he is often in the paper. Having effectively brought him up with my sister when she was a single mum, I feel in a way as if he was my own and I am proud of him. He is a bit misguided when out with friends as we all are at that age (13), however I try to give advice where and when I can. Not to mention my niece Jade (16) who I am also proud of. She is doing well at school and is about to go on to college. She’s got a well developed personality and is very mature. I told her the other day how the whole family are proud of her in a heartfelt internet convo and I meant every word. (she probably thought I was drunk or something or off my rocker lol)

That’s about it for an update. Will update when I have some news.

as the world goes round.

2008-10-24T15:18:00.004+01:00

A little ditty to start this blog off:

As the world goes round
The worlds in depression
I get the impression
its time to leave this town

As the world goes round
crisis of the financial
the worlds gone mad
its time to keep feet on the ground

As the world goes round
people are thankful
for what they have
frantically cherishing every pound

Hi there, hope you enjoyed my little ode to current events. Felt creative there for some reason.

I've had bloggers block....... yes it sounds painfull, but no its just lack of things to put in this here blog. Somethings better then nothing i've realised. So thoughts and ramblings I am going to share with you from now on as well as what goes on in my life

.
Lately, has been uneventful.... a good start i know, but bare with me. My weeks are routine consisting of going to work and going home and spending the nights watching TV or going online. Its a good life and boredom doesn't bother me. I have a high tollerance for it. Its only when i come to write about my goings on that i get frustrated of being able to share nothing.

Recnently however, things are starting to happen. My dad and his girlfriend are currently en route to Scotland for a trip leaving me by myself for the entire weekend. Good or bad news....hmm, well now i get to not breathe in their smog as they puff ciggarettes every waking second or hear their bickering as they sip their whiskey of a night. So yeah, its excellent news.

I had plans this month. To get my boy's Christmas presents in, to get myself a PS3 or at least put some money away for one and to get some forms sent off for a new Provisional Driving licence. None of these have come to pass due to money restrictions i'm afraid to say. So yet again, they are put on the back burner until next month. Fingers crossed. Instead this month, i've been purchasing the odd piece of clothing that i think would suit me, but at the same time being reasonably priced. I seemed to have done a great job so far. No one will notice that the clothing i wear only cost me about £5 per item. I ain't big on spending loads on brand names. As long as i look good and feel comfy then whats the problem.

I had a deviant spell today. I needed to return some jeans to ASDA (our version of Walmart), but the cashier wouldn't take them back without a receipt. What was i supposed to do, just wear them and suck it in. They wouldn't even zip up when i tried them on at home (serves me right for not trying them on in the store when i bought them). I thus continued to gather the correct jeans from the rack that i wanted, took them into the changing rooms and swapped them there and then with the smaller jeans swapping tags and so on. ( i know, i know, its illegal, but i was fuming). I casually then walked out of the changing rooms, put the used jeans up on the hanger and walked out of the store whilst looking all paranoid, as us non-shoplifters do. I felt real guilty about it, but accomplished. I had visions of laughing in that cashier's face. HA!

anyways. Will leave it at that. Best wishes to my friend Emma who has been feeling under the weather lately. Hope you feel yourself soon.

Update ya later.

Listen up ok? its Blog Action Day!

2008-10-15T11:58:00.004+01:00

Its an important present crisis in the world that needs to be recognised and a solution needs to be found for it.

That is the plan for the folks over at http://blogactionday.org/. Today more then 10.000 sites will participate in posting articles about a big global issue , about poverty. Their goal is to assign a DAY in a year when everybody should talk, write, read about a big global issue, about poverty. With even blogs like this we can make a bigger impact in transiting the message: we should act NOW in helping people and countries that are in poverty.

If you own a blog of your own, do your bit and mention poverty and your views. Thank you.

Back to the Past - part 2

2008-09-08T13:40:00.003+01:00

Heres the second installment of my blogs from 2005. It seems so long ago now, almost as if looking back through different eyes. If i only knew then what i know now things would be so much different. This blog entry however never got published, the reason why escapes me, but maybe at the time I didn't feel like publishing it on the forum i used to visit. Here it is anyway.

Yet Another Entry (Draft)

Posted by Mal , 22 Mar 2005, 11:36 PM

Hi all, another entry here. Not much happening. My life is non-eventful. The regular occurrences that define boredom. But hey, it will do for now until something exciting comes along.

The divorce petition was sent to my ex in tx. Fair to say she wasn't happy at all with some of the reasons for divorce I put down in it. Mainly it was a list of all her flaws and bad points that she had while we were married. I didn't even know the exact list was going to be sent. I found out when I got messages saying "PHONE ME NOW!" and "WE NEED TO TALK". Fair to say I was a bit hesitant and crapping my pants when worrying about phoning. When I phoned she was in angry/crying mode. I tried to explain and calm her down. I apologised profusely, but nothing seemed to do the trick. Apparently, even though I said what I said, she would still fly over here to be with me, but I am set on the single life and our time in the sun has eclipsed.

That’s the exiting/nervous/sad part done, as for the rest of my time, I have been on the net talking to friends, playing online pool, playing on my new demolition derby game while thrashing out to rock. (rock on).

Life’s hard at home at the moment. Is has been 4 years this month since my mother died. It was her birthday, Mothers day and the date she died all in one month, being March. Safe to say it is not my favourite month. My dad is on a low because of it. He seems too fragile when it comes to do with anything like that. The poison he has chosen is Whisky. Yuck. Whenever I get upset, I just close down and withdraw, I don't drink. It is not even a way out, it is more like a tranquiliser. Anyways, seeing him acomatosed on the floor every night is not good to see and it always gets me upset. In a way I want to move out and get a place on my own, and in a way I don’t because it would upset my dad while he is going though stages like this.

I can say with some certainty that I am not saddened anymore by the passing of my mother, which is weird cause I was the closest to her during the final years, or maybe that is why I am not phased by it. My dad and brother I think took it the worst as they weren’t getting on. Will have to get something good to take to the cemetery for the grave.

Work is good. Got my pace of work set now to a timed perfection, but with a few mistakes, will have to work on it. My wrist has started to hurt when I overuse it, or rotate (like turning a key or pouring something). I bought a support on the net, but it seems it is a weightlifting support and doesn't really help. I think I have carpel tunnel syndrome or something.

Taking driving lessons at the moment. I did take some like two years ago, but I am desperate to get them finished so I can get the test done so I can get a car eventually. It will open opportunities for me. I enjoy driving, but when I make a mistake, I lock up and make more accidentally, I need to work on that.As for relationships - non-existent. I am trying to get out and socialise, but it seems hard to do, as I have no friends. They all left to go and do their own thing. (not my type anyway). The only one I go out for a night out with is Key (Cieran) my sister’s hubby. He is cool. A guitar enthusiast loves to jam with his guitar, and he likes rock music like me. Bit of a neat freak but he is a good laugh. He only seems to go out on a Tuesday for an Acoustic Night at a local pub. A bad day for me as I work the day after, would prefer a Friday or Saturday, but hey I am getting out. Just need to find the courage now to approach people and talk. Is hard to do, when your confidence has been knocked down by bad neighbours and bad arguments with lovers and family. (but I guess I am just making excuses for myself, I shouldn't really). I should make more of an effort.

Need to free up some space on my comp. My song total now is over 1,000 and it is slowing my comp down a lot. Might see about putting them all on disc, or getting more memory. I'm just a music freak. The bands I am listening to recently are Franz Ferdinand, The Killers, Ram Jam, Jet, The Bravery and more. All Rock of course, wouldn't have it any other way. (sorry the bananaman is cool)

Back to the Past - Part 1

2008-09-05T14:05:00.012+01:00

Returning to one of my old internet hangouts recently, Halton Forum, a messageboard for the local area in which i live, i stumbled across my old blog dating back to 2005. Theres quite a few, lengthy entries there. I thought it would be a good idea to post some up here over the coming days to give you all a glimpse into my past, a time that was quite a struggle for me.

The backstory before i continue is that i had just come out of a two year marriage and at the time of the blogs, was going through divorce proceedings and getting myself back on track money wise and also trying to get back into dating again. Just thought I'd share them with you. Hope that they add more knowledge to those who want to get to know me more.

So, step into my time machine (a good link to the blog before hand ain't it) because we are going back to..........

13th Jan 2005.

A Quest to Purchase Spectigoggles....
Posted by Mal, 13 Jan 2005, 12:26 PM

Hi there, First Entry on my blog If you were able to decipher my title I today went to get my eyes tested. The results...... my eyes worsened since last time I got them tested.Went with my dad, who needed his doing too. Both going to get new glasses, mine going to be stylish and so are my dads, with free sunglasses.

After that went to make an appointment to get a divorce from my estranged ex. Yes, I am married, and also 22, *shock* *horror* *(add any emotion you want here)* I couldn’t be more happy to do so. She said she never missed me as much as she thought she did and didn't love me throughout the 3 year relationship, saying she always wanted to break up but couldn't bring herself around to it. Her loss I guess. I treated her the best a man could, falling over and bending over backwards to make her happy (literally). It might cost more because it is international but I will just have to get some advice so I know what I am doing and see how it goes from there.

....o0(divorced at 22, damn! give it time and I will catch up with Ross Geller! lol)

Feeling Not To Good
Posted by Mal , 14 Jan 2005, 08:45 PM

"woke up this mornin...(no it isn't a Hermans Hermits song) .... and I felt sooo tired. I got to bed early...ish and just felt so sluggish. With tiredness in my eyes, stumbling over the bomb site I call my room in a rush to turn my alarm off (I had to be a dumbass and place it across the room, or maybe my subconscious did it so I couldn't snooze lol ). Anyways, was really tired and groggy.

With head spinnin' headed downstairs after collecting all my work clothes from my wardrobe, to attempt to wake myself up with some coffee. My morning viewing consists of a documentary of monkeys in a sanctuary I think in the UK called Monkey Business (Channel 4 shoved my fave programs, Friends and Everybody Loves Raymond off the usual spot and instead show Big Brother). I find monkeys amazing so I don't mind watchin them, tis fun. Then after that watch a bit of big brother, which after watchin monkeys and then big bro, you kinda see the similarity. lol Especially with John, the big hairy ape.

Work was slow (always is), with hardly any calls and frequent work to do from my boss. Was stressed out last night as the ATM machine swallowed my card , it seems I never told the bank of my moving house, I can be such a dumbass at times. So I am havin to rely on my dad for money for the time being.

Can't wait to get paid. Going to get new clothes, haircut, and glasses and I am going to start getting out. I am not one for going to clubs and pubs, but I am sick of spending all my time inside. Maybe I might find someone new. Got home earlier on and didn't feel any better. Took paracetamol and felt a bit better now.Going now to tidy up my bomb site of a room in readiness for a lads night in with my nephew watching Hellboy on DVD. bye

As the days go by, i'll post up more entries from back in 2005.

End of the world due to Science test?

2008-09-03T13:54:00.010+01:00

During recent years, science has been taking leaps and bounds with discoveries and technology, which in turn is motivating scientists to explore more unchartered territory. What I ask is will these experiments create a devastating chain of events that could somehow be the end of all life as we know it? The answer could probably be yes.

Scientists say that they are going to re-create the Big Bang on a small scale.

“Tests have cleared the way for the start-up next month of an experiment to restage a mini-version underground of the "Big Bang" which created the universe 15 billion years ago, the project chief said on Monday 25th August.”

Holy moly! When I first heard of this, I was thinking how on earth can they possibly do that. Well, scientists have found a way, as they do using a machine they've invented called the Large Hadron Collider. They state that they can stage a new big bang if they smash some protons together. (a million per second, which is way more than god managed).

But what could go wrong with this experiment? As S Peter Davis from Cracked.com so brilliantly puts it:

“Well, first imagine an apocalyptic nuclear holocaust. Multiply that by about one hundred and twenty thousand billion, and then multiply that by around the neighbourhood of infinity. That equals around one eighth of the magnitude of the Big Bang. Nevertheless, scientists are pretty sure they can contain their Big Bang in an Erlenmeyer flask, just so long as they remember to cork it.”

“The problem, of course, is that even the eggheads don't really know what's going to happen, which is sort of why they're doing it in the first place. Scientists on the LHC project insist there is no danger, and predict that the resulting observations could revolutionize science and send us into a golden age of knowledge, in the event that we actually survive.”

So, being blown to smithereens maybe a slight side effect from this experiment. Fantastic.

Another eventuality is the accumulation of strange matter. Strange matter is a hypothetical material made up of quarks, which are one of the building blocks of reality, things so small that you can't even possibly imagine. There are two hypotheses about strange matter. One is that the stuff will simply disappear a fraction of a second after it appears. The other is that it will stabilise and convert every atom it comes in contact with into more strange matter. If the latter happened here on earth, in no time, we’d all be dead. Fantastic x2. Scientists respond to the strange matter problem by saying if it was ever going to happen, it would have happened already (since these kind of reactions happen a zillion times a second in our atmosphere anyway), but if the eventuality that it did happen, everyone would be dead, thus no one to due them. Great.

Another theory is that the LHC might open wormholes with its high-energy collisions that future generations can manipulate for time travelling purposes. This is great news if you don’t think too much into it. If you are willing to delve deeper into the dangers of time travel, there’s the possibility you could meet yourself in the past and cause the universe to collapse, there’s altering something vital in the past causing a chain reaction and thus killing everyone, there’s the possibility that future generations may use the time machine to travel back in time from their dwindling version of earth due to lack of resources to a previous time to live, causing over population and faster consumption of resources, which would be never-ending. The list goes on.

I'm not in anyway a scientific guy, but the facts surrounding this expriment are too obvious to ignore. I hope no side effects happen, they are able to contain the reaction, and that we are all around afterwards. Is that too much to ask. On the lighter side of this scientific broadcast, we may finally be able to explore what made us, the planets, the stars and all life as we know it in the first place.

I hope I've only enlightened you to the possibilities and not scared you into a frenzy building your own bomb shelter or tieing up your noose. Its concerning stuff, but maybe curiosity didn't kill the cat, but only miffed it off a bit.

My next blog will focus back on the main topic....me

Ciao!

the weekend update

2008-09-01T11:13:00.008+01:00

Hello all, Nice to see you again.

I really appreciate you coming along to visit my blog. Thank you very much

My weekend went by quite fast. Mostly due to my only waking up yesterday (Sunday) at 2pm lol I must have needed the sleep.

It all started off well. I joined some friends on Saturday in attending a rock gig. Playing at the gig was a band I used to follow, but due to the fact they sounded real bad and tension had formed with them and friendships had turned sour, I left them to their own thing. On Friday however, I was prepared to give them another shot to see if they had improved their performance. They still sucked. Each to their own, but I enjoy good music. I went to the gig with two close friends Kate and Chris, two friends that I don’t really see often enough, but plan to in the future.

The gig went well overall, met up with Chris and Kate a bit early at the venue and had a laugh and a drink and went to get seats outside, as the gig was outside of the club. My ex and her friends arrived shortly afterwards and sat somewhere else. I got occasional looks from her as the night went by, which didn’t really bother me as I was having a laugh. Miss Purple was there (as mentioned in previous blogs), she came over to say hello and tried to make small talk. Asking questions like Why I had left without saying goodbye the previous week (she was off talking to others and I had had enough of tweedle dum (my ex) and her friend tweedle dee). She also asked if I was going to her housewarming. I had already promised Kate and Chris that I’d be sleeping over at theirs, plus it would have been awkward with my ex and her friends going also.

As the night went on, Chris had to leave to go and attend his mate’s party, which left me in Kate’s company. She has a thing of getting quite close and touchy, which confused me at first, but not for long as she spouted out all night long how much she loved Chris. I think she was sat so close to annoy my ex, as my ex had called her some names in the past. It worked. My ex text me if I was seeing her, which made us both laugh. There is no way I’d date a friend’s girlfriend especially one as good as Chris and she definitely isn’t my type. Kate is a rock chick, but dresses real gothic and smokes a bit too much. We have a laugh though and I consider her to be a good friend. It was good to see my ex jealous, even though I hadn’t planned on it. I text her back saying nothing was going on and that I couldn’t believe she had even asked lol

The night went on and I got wasted and had a laugh with kate and then we went back to hers for some more drinks with her and he brother and his mates. Everything was alright apart from the average testosterone show you normally get with teenage boys trying to show off to their female visitors. Quite like how gorillas would fight off new contender’s to keep their place as leader of the pack. Kate’s brother tried in vein to make fun of me, but I gave as good as I got and equally made fun of him, which at one point I thought he was going to start a fight and he was a big and muscly dude, but he just sulked off somewhere. Must have been the beer giving me some courage.

After I had proved that I was in no way one to mess with and my place in the household leader board was set, I settled down for drinks with the other teens and got to know them and had a chat with Kate and one of her next door neighbours outside of the house in the back garden. Chris came back later one and we retired to the living room and watched Silence of the Lambs, which was very surreal.

Later on that day, I woke up in a totally alien place. Their house, unknown to me, had three floors. I got lost easily and walked into a bedroom by mistake. I panicked, but I was alright eventually as I got my bearings and just chillaxed on the couch, where I had been sleeping. I also got lost trying to get out of their neighbourhood and to the local shopping centre to catch a bus. My head was elsewhere and I looked a mess, but after trekking and numerous back tracks, I made it out and caught a bus to my ex’s to collect Kallam.

When I got there, I stayed a bit to see how Rhys (my step son) was doing, but also trying to ascertain why my ex was being so nice. A friend of mine seems to think that she wants me back, but I needed to know for sure. When chatting for a bit with her, I came to the conclusion that she might, but I cannot be sure. I’m more naive then most and probably can’t spot the signs, but everything just seemed friendly (which I must admit is weird, especially for my ex who in the past has treated me like something that was on the sole of her shoe). My conclusion, even if she is being nice to get me back, I wouldn’t even entertain the idea. I’ve moved on and realised that whilst we had some good times when we were together, the love that I felt wasn’t as strong in the last year that we were together. I recall many times when we were together, before Kallam was born contemplating ending the relationship, but put the idea on the backburner when Kallam was born.

The day with Kallam went well anyway, I took him to get his hair trimmed. I wanted it cut short, but the ex wanted it just trimmed. For the rest of the day, we spent most of it at mine just messing about and cherishing the time we had together. Normally, I would hate the bus journeys there and back, as they take in excess of an hour each time, but I was surprisingly alright, mostly due to having a new music player/phone. I recently won on auction a Sony Ericsson W850i for an amazing price of £53 and now have all of my songs on it. It makes the trips a whole lot shorter that for sure. I can’t live without my music.

That’s it for now. Update ya later

Random Questionnaire Day

2008-08-29T14:23:00.001+01:00

Random Interesting Questions

What is your favorite memory from your past?:	family holidays to Wales. They were times that i cherish most and also the birth of my son Kallam. That memory will be my most favorite.
What event do you think made the biggest difference in your life?:	My mother's death. Her passing away changed my life for the best and for the worst. It taught me to be more independant, but left me with a void of love that i've needed ever since.
What are you most proud of in your life?:	MY son Kallam, best thing i've made since design and technology class
Has anything tradgic happened to you lately?:	nothing lately to me, but some lady was unfortunatley ran over near to where i live. Very tragic indeed.
If yes, how are you coping?:	I cope well but my thoughts go out to her family and friends.
Who was your role model growing up?:	My dad. His personality has become mine and he has taught me a lot of what not to do through his own faults and shared me his wisdom.
What is your least fav. food?:	onions! urgh!
Are you happy with your career status?:	yeah, its real good. good pay and a constant challenge.
Do you believe you have accomplished all that you want to in life?:	not everything no. I want to drive, but lack the funding and "drive" to get out and do it.
Who are you most proud of at this moment?:	My nephew. Hes going to Wembley to play rugby. Hes that good. :P hes a local star. Only 13 but has a bright future ahead of him.
Has anyone ever said something that truly saved your life?:	not really, but i really should have listened when my mum said "don't do too much of that, you'll go blind". lol
Is there one thing you regret most in your past? If yes, what?:	getting married. It was a low point in my life for sure. There was no love there and it is something i regret very much.
What one thing would you want your kids to know about your life?:	Everything, from my mistakes, i want him/them to be able to learn from them and live a happy and sucessful life.
If you were to die tomorrow would you want to be buried or cremated?:	Cremated. The simple fact that with cematories becoming gradually packed to the brim with coffins, i would like to do my bit and be put in the oven and switched to well done. That way whatever family i have can take me home and i can have pride and place on a mantlepiece or something. Preferably not a toilet or garden shed.
If you could say sorry to anyone in your life who would it be and what would you say sorry for?:	I'd say sorry to my mum. I took her for granted far more then i should have. She catered for my evey whim, cooked meals, cleaned up and asked for nothing in return (well probably did secretly as all women do). Thanks Mum you were a star.
Are you addicted to anything that is not a recreational drug?:	nothing whatsoever. I have strong will power.
What is your favorite TYPE of show?:	Comedy definately.
Where in the world would you love to retire?:	a nice little bungalo would do me, close to everything and with little noise from neighbours and main roads.
How many children do you have?:	one. Kallam. He means the world to me and he will be one at the end of September.
Do you agree with the war stradegy?:	I dont agree with anything that involves war. I tend to keep my nose out.
Who is your fav. politician?:	dont have one. Not into politices even though politics govern what goes on in our everyday life.
What religion are you?:	not religious. With the scientific facts available to us, it is hard to beleive.
What was your fav. cartoon when you were young?:	Thundercats. If you ain't heard of it. check it out on you tube. The theme tune rocked.
Are you a slob, clean freak, or in between?:	in between. I can be messy around the house, but equally when i get going i like to be as tidy as possible. Depends on my mood.
If you could afford a maid, would you have one?:	yes definately. I'd prefer not to tidy at all. :P
What was your first pet? What was its name?:	Sam, a golden retriever
Are you in love? If not, do you want to find someone perfect?:	I wouldn't say i was in love, not just yet, but i foresee someone on the horizon that could well fit into that category, time will be the ultimate test.
How old were you when you had your first "crush"?:	about 13, nothing came of it because she was a couple of years older then me.
What grade was your fav. when you were in school?:	probably year 10 as i wasn't a new student and didnt have the fears of starting somewhere big like high school and neither was i coming towards the end of school and preparing for the big exams.
What one life lesson have you learned so far, and what does it mean to you?:	To stay true to myself. All through life so far i've tried changing myself to fit in with others and in the process losing track of who i am myself. Only now do i realise that i should just be me and that is good enough.

Click here to take this survey or find others at surveyspace.
Click here to create your own.

Thunder in the Jungle....

2008-08-27T11:23:00.006+01:00

Hi Folks,

Just another blog from your friendly neighbourhood Brit.

Nothing has happened lately since the last post except my daily routine:

7am - wake up
7 - 8am - watch tv (i call this wake up time)
8 - 8.30am - get prepared for work.

8.30 - 840am - walk to work

8.40 - 5pm - work (with frequent internet breaks)

5pm - 7pm - watch tv and have tea (evening meal)
7pm - 11pm - go on internet / play on games console / watch film or two..

As you can see, my life consists of some riveting stuff there. I hope to break the everlasting circle of doom soon either by taking up a new hobby or maybe getting out more. We'll see what becomes of me very soon.

As for whats been on my mind, many things. For one, why my ex has been so nice to me lately. She has sent me texts saying how great of a father i am and that she is sorry for the way she has treated me in the past. I don't know whether to take this as a sincere apology or just a sneaky way of trying to get something. I would in all honesty take it as being sincere being the kind of person i am, seeing the good in everyone, but theres a side that wants to be safe remembering all the times shes used and been nasty. She is yet again going to a place i am going to at the weekend. Not sure what her game is, but i hope i find out soon.

FILM REVIEW:

TROPIC THUNDER

UK Release date: 13th September 2008

Synopsis: Ben Stiller. Jack Black. Robert Downey Jr. Comedy fans can start drooling immediately at the thought of these three funnymen joining forces in Tropic Thunder. The men star as a trio of actors whose filming experience in southeast Asia gets a little too real as they must become as tough as the... Ben Stiller. Jack Black. Robert Downey Jr. Comedy fans can start drooling immediately at the thought of these three funnymen joining forces in Tropic Thunder. The men star as a trio of actors whose filming experience in southeast Asia gets a little too real as they must become as tough as the characters they play to get out of a crisis.

This film has got to be, in my books, the most funniest comedies this year. For the simple facts, it has three of the best comedians around, Ben Stiller, Jack Black and Robert Downey Jnr and it has a funny storyline.

The movie is a well aimed parody at all big budget war movies that have ever been made and also takes a low blow at Hollywood itself. It seems to do a good job at making fun of them all. One of the biggest sucker punches in the film is Stillers character Tugg Speedman and how he as an actor tried to pull of a film about a mentaly disabled farm boy called Simple Jack. This is making fun of actors who court awards in such ham-handed and obvious ways. In the movie, Simple Jack is a failure, and Speedman is a jackass.

Since this parody came to light however, regardless of its funny intentions, at least 22 disability rights groups such as the Special Olympics and the American Association of People with Disabilities are angry about the use of the “r-word” and the character and have called for a boycott of the film and the theaters that show it. They hold, possibly correctly, that the use of the words “retard” and “retarded” are offensive and hurtful and that some people might see Tropic Thunder and think it clever to fling the words round.

But that ain't enough, Tropic Thunder also makes fun of the actors who try to emerse themselves too much into films, as evidenced by Kirk Lazarus an blonde Australian played by Downey Jnr who undergoes a controversial skin pigmentation operation to make him look african-american so that he can play the part of one of the characters of the movie. He goes so far to not change his accent through most of the movie. Downey Jnr really steals the film and his acting and humour is brilliant to watch. And then there is Jack Black who plays a drug addict actor who has starred in many low budget films before Tropic Tropic thunder, but loses his drugs and goes haywire. Very funny to watch.

All in all, the film is definately one to watch. I'll give it a 9/10.

Long time no read ay?

2008-08-24T22:40:00.003+01:00

Hi, I'm back from my bloggin break. To be honest I went off blogging.....aaah shocking i know, but I've not been in the mood to rely a good story to all of you readers, but you'll be happy to know i'm back in "the zone" now and ready to blog.

Before i proceed, check the pics out above the text. They are basically a collection of all the photos i've managed to salvage from my mobile phone now that i'd recently bought a USB lead for it. Some of them date back to March. The ones with the red coat on Kal were took yesterday.

So as to recent events. I turned 26 on Tuesday. I've long since gotten over the fact that I am getting older and I am now just getting on with it. I feel like a spring chicken still and thats what counts. I didn't get anything special for my birthday, except for beer from work, which you have to admit is unusual lol and an extra special gift from someone special. It was an amazing stylophone!! Now i hear you all asking, what on earth is a stylophone. Its a musical instrument.... not a popular one i'll admit, but one that could barely pass for one. The Stylophone was a runaway success in the '70s, not so much within musical circles (although they have been used by such luminaries as David Bowie, Kraftwerk and Pulp) but as a gimmick and a toy. It has a horrible, buzzy pulse wave through a small cheap speaker that sounded like a very butch wasp on steroids, but still you've got to admit it rocks. Seriously, look at the guy with it below. lol

So, Birthday aside, the weeks been a goodun. Was payday this week so bought stuff and paid my rent and maintanence. I got a bargain on ebay when looking for a new cell phone. I bought a Sony Ericsson W850i for only £60, which is great as they are normally worth around £100. Go me! Just waiting for it to come through in the post now. I also bought some cool clothes for my son Kal off ebay all thanks to Emma for the recomendation. Much appreciated. Shes like my shopping advisor lol.

I went out last night to celebrate my birthday. I did invite most of my friends on Facebook, reminding them through the week on and off of my birthday night out....... only one turned up. Plus there was no live band on to liven the night up. To make it even worse, my ex and her friends (my old friends that are my ex's friends) turned up and were in my face the whole night asking me to dance and acting overly happy. It was frustrating and hard to keep a happy face on instead of the disapointed face that i would have put on had they not been there. I drank up and went home to forget about that night. Nuff said about that...

As for today, I've just basically been watching movies. I watched Tropic Thunder. Wow, what an amazing film. After watching for it, its as though Ben Stiller and Robert Downey Jr are asking for lawsuits after portraying a white austrailian acting coloured and Ben Stiller acting as he calls "retarded". Very risky, but it was still an hilarious film. Go see. I also watched the new Star Wars animated film and Get Smart. Both not as good as Tropic Thunder, but still great films. As for how i got to see them coming from the UK, the less i talk about my methods the better

Will leave this blog till next time, and i promise that i won't leave it as long next time.

ciao!

Book Review: Making Money

2008-08-11T16:00:00.003+01:00

Title: Making Money

Author: Terry Pratchett

Synopsis (From Amazon.co.uk):

"It's an offer you can't refuse. Who would not to wish to be the man in charge of Ankh-Morpork's Royal Mint and the bank next door? It's a job for life.But, as former con-man Moist von Lipwig is learning, the life is not necessarily for long. The Chief Cashier is almost certainly a vampire. There's something nameless in the cellar (and the cellar itself is pretty nameless), it turns out that the Royal Mint runs at a loss. A 300 year old wizard is after his girlfriend, he's about to be exposed as a fraud, but the Assassins Guild might get him first. In fact lot of people want him dead.Oh. And every day he has to take the Chairman for walkies. Everywhere he looks he's making enemies. What he should be doing is ...Making Money!"

Review:

Making Money is the 34th book in the Discworld series, and seems to be in a whole different league then the first books in the Discworld series altogether. The new line of books take on a more serious approach, tackling indirectly current matters that have happened either present or past in our world, i.e. rock n roll, hollywood, but more recently has gone into the realms of the postal service and now money.When I say serious, that in no way means that Making Money is a boring book full of facts about currency and the history of decimalisation, far from it. It still has the juicy funny bits as all Terry Prachett fans will be familiar with, but they admittantly are more subdued. I for one loved the earlier books, namely the ones featuring the City Watch and Death, which had me laughing out loud at least twice during every chapter. Reading Making Money is more like a nostalgia trip back into Discworld and reading Terry fine tuning the world he built and emphasising on the world he created and loves.

There were some confusing bits regarding a magical contraption made for viewing the economy of the city and allowing someone to control it too. Those bits were hard to follow, but mostly the book had a fluid storyline which had you gripped from the word go. The familiar characters helped this, Lord Vetenari, Moist, the watch and wizards from the Unseen University.

The book contained enough action, comedy and fantasy to keep the average book reader entertained and I eagerly await his next book in the series. Like with most things, I’m not a big fan, but enough of a fan to follow the series and maybe re-read the past books again. Its my kind of humour totally and enjoy getting lost in his books.

I’d give Making Money 8/10

the wrong side of the bed blues

2008-08-10T12:25:00.002+01:00

oh, i feel rough. I shouldn't drink so much on a night out. Especially with money being like it is.. The mood of this blog is probably because i'm listening to some depressing songs. Not by choice, as i'm listening to my last.fm player. I typed in beatles, and it gives me artists related to them. totally random.

so yeah, i took last nights drinking quite hard this morning. It didn't seem like i drank much, but i must have got carried away. The contributing factor could be that my ex just happened to be at the same bar i went to. ugh. yeah thats right. Shortly after getting comfortable, i noticed two women lookin quite tweedle dee and tweedle dum, short, fat and a stupid expression on their faces. To make sure i wasn't seeing things, i quickly went to the smoking area to text her asking where she was. I didn't get a chance to as her friend Amy came outside too checking who was out there. She looked at me totally in suprise and as if i was a ghost. I stated quite calmly that i was here to see the band i follow and she was all "oh right". I said tell kay is said hi. Never spoke to her all night but through the night she kept lookin over and acting overly happy talking to people. At this point i just ignored her, but felt her stares digging into the side of my head.

The night went on and the band played an awsome set. Check the bands myspace here: Kessler. After allwas done, i got a lift home and collapsed in bed. I wasn't too happy to be woken up early by a knock at the door by a naughty boy called Daniel.

That brings me onto recent events quite nicely. Since Friday, my dad's girlfriend's daughter, Angie has been staying at our house along with two troublesome kids. I met them on our scotland trip and after meeting them then, i thanked the lord that i didn't have to live in that house with them. She has five in total and they totally run the house. Climbing on counters, jumping on people, always making a mess and general trouble making. Well i got to meet two of them again. Daniel and Kirstin. Daniel, 4 years old, ignoring his angel smile is a little git. He is the devil. He is the chief trouble maker. He knows not what personal space means and goes through anything he can get his hands on and goes places where he should not, mainly my bedroom. I need a lock. Then there is Kirstin, shes 13 i think and shes great. She has Global Development Disorder, which i am not sure what it means, but she is slower then most kids, its not exactly autism i know that for sure. She too has no meaning of personal space. For instance, i was sat there watchin TV and she plonks herself down on my lap. I know i shouldn't complain, but i am not used to it at all and its uncomfortable living with them. She has a thing of walking around the house very quietly, which freaks me out. i'll be happy when they go back up to scotland shortly. :P

As for now, i'll leave you with my all time fave comedian just to add a bit of humour into your lives and to cheer me up. Its Lee Evans, probably the funniest, multi talented, guy i've ever seen. I'd love to meet him one day lol Theres a bit of swearing but its not intense like some 18 rated film or anything. Enjoy

I'm well and truly emodisfunct

2008-08-06T11:36:00.003+01:00

I love making new words up. (If you do too, check the new widget I’ve put in the side bar of my blog) Emodisfunct is a word I have just created. It represents that feeling you get when you are confused emotionally and get overly emotional over things. The word can be successfully married up with how I’m feeling right now. The contributing factor, women, as is always the case.

Given the fact that I find it difficult to express emotions due to always locking them up, please bare with me if my explanations and wording is a bit off. This is blog entry that follows suit from a blog I read and enjoy frequently. That is, instead of writing about material things, journeys and work, I’m going to talk about my emotions, feelings and all that stuff.

Firstly, let me take you back three years or so. This was when I met my ex for the first time and as a result, met her friends. Some were good hearted girls and guys but some were just cruel. One of the good ones I made a bond with (lets call her Miss Blue), but a little too late as I’d already made my bed with my ex. She was bubbly and caring, but was at the time infatuated with a local rock star. They broke up a year later, and while out on a bender at a gig I confessed to fancying the pants off her. She took it quite well, but as I was with my ex, she didn’t make any sort of counter move.

We talk frequently online through msn or Facebook again, and I’m glad to say she is happy and content with a guy. What confuses me is that she says that if she was not with him, she’d happily date me. It is safe to say I was quite taken back by it, but why now and what good does it do me? We still talk, but the eventuality that something will happen is not good. It was a crush back but not really had feelings for her for a while, so not sure how I feel about this one. Probably nothing will happen. Miss Blue’s emodisfunct rating: 3

Secondly, this girl was yet another friend I met through my ex. She was quiet and reserved, but caring and mature for her age (lets call her Miss Purple), but I met her a little too late as I’d already made my bed with my ex. On nights out to a local club we got along like a house on fire, we shared music tastes and we could talk for hours. She had a rock look about her, jeans, retro tops, brunette hair and stylish converse shoes. As the years went on I was overjoyed every time she came to visit, well... not overjoyed, but glad to see she was alright.

I found myself gaining an attraction to Miss Purple and I was not able to do anything about it. Now that I am single and noticed she was too after splitting with her boyfriend, I needed to get these feelings off my chest and to see if anything was possible. I expressed my feelings to her over msn chat, as I hardly see her these days but talk infrequently on Facebook or msn. Miss Purple was not really overjoyed herself at the confession and said something along the lines of “but your my friend” and “omg!”. Not quite the response I was looking for. She has been ignoring me since. Miss Purple’s emodisfunct rating: 6 1/2.

And then onto the third “dilemma”, Miss Pink. (she’s probably reading this and in doing so at this point will be paying closer attention). She is the one mostly on my mind, which is evident seeing as though she is last in my list. Miss Pink is one of my blog buddies and I’ve known her for some time now. We’ve helped each other out, given advice and gradually have formed a bond. She is a fabulous friend, one who gives frank advice and listens to my problems. She’s an excellent mother to her two children and takes pride in everything they do. It’s fair to say I’ve never met anyone like her before. She’s really good looking even though she doesn’t like to say so and is also beautiful on the inside (her personality not her intestines) lol. She’s confessed on a number of occasions that she feels the same way. I’d give anything just to have a hug from her. The problem, as she so rightly puts it in her blog, is that there is a very big distance between us. She lives in Leicester and I live near Liverpool, a total distance of 113 miles. That kind of makes the dating thing a problem if we both chose to take things further, which I’d very much like to try. Life’s never fair.

Although, I’d like to just have her attracted to me and only me, the truth is, deep down inside, I know there will be others she will take an interest to while I’m half way across the country. This fact in particular is hard to accept, but one fact I’ll have to accept. I would have expressed these feelings to her in person, but its best she reads them all in one go instead of in little sentences in a chat box. It came as a shock to read about Miss Pink’s other love interests, mostly because I had probably gotten too close to Miss Pink or maybe it was because of the connection we share together. I’m unsure. I hope Miss Pink understands as she reads it. I am not hurt by what she’s written, but have woke up from the dream world where I’m on a pedestal and am the only one she has an interest in, and now understand the truth that I’m not the only one, there are others understandably that she is attracted to. This I should know very well having chosen to write about my interests too. I hope that I’ve made it clear how I feel above. I am in no way hurt or upset, just to make it clear. Miss Pink’s emodisfunct rating: 9 1/2

It is a great way to get things off your chest. I plan to do it more often instead of locking my emotions inside. As for now, i'll leave it at that.

Blog ya later

the promised photos

2008-08-04T21:09:00.000+01:00

I still miss my ex.......... but my aims improving

2008-08-04T13:57:00.006+01:00

A funny thought just occurred to me, the title of my blog being the thing that triggered it. Others seem to get by in life without any sort of guidance at all, maybe all I need is a wakeup call and write this “instruction book” for myself, make my own guide to how I want my life to be. I need a checklist on what I want to accomplish. To start off with here are the things I want to do within this year:

1. Lower my outgoings (debts and whatnots)

2. After clearing debts, get driving. Not being able to drive is becoming an inconvenience now and I’d love nothing more than to travel the country to see people I’ve met online or just to go to see people in the neighbouring town of a night and not have to worry about catching a bus.

3. Maybe find my own place. This will all depend on my financial situation after clearing debts.

4. Maybe get a new job. Totally bored in my present one. Either get a new job or seek promotion.

It’s going to take some work, but hopefully, I’ll be sorted soon. I’m at a low point and I just need to keep saying to myself “I will be a success in all aspects”. Well, maybe not them words exactly, but something along the lines.

Back to the blog anyway. The recent weeks been a testing one. I had a spat with my ex again, but I’m starting to think I was the unreasonable one. I text her that I couldn’t have Kallam for a full weekend because there wasn’t enough space in my bedroom for the cot. She took this badly as if she wanted desperately for me to mind Kallam. So much so that she even said “have him the weekend or not see him ever again”. This turn of events can be summed up by the saying “hoisted by my own petard”. I actually cried during this argument and at the thought of losing Kallam. She also called me every nasty name under the sun. She also said to watch my back whenever I am out in public. This just goes to show how nasty and manipulative she is. All backed up by her friend, as mentioned in previous posts. Every time I phone she is heard in the background relaying to my ex what she should say to me. That is why I resort to texting. It’s easier and gets the message across without having to shout.

I backed down in the end, as the thought of not seeing Kallam again had me sobbing uncontrollably. We came to a compromise agreement that I was to have him Saturday night only. I set quickly about finding room for the cot. It was hard, in the end I had to totally rearrange my bedroom and get rid of some furniture. It fit, just about, but leaving no access to the other side of the room. It was alright in my view just as long as I got to see Kallam and not having to go through legal proceedings to do so in the future. Seeing Kallam again after all this drama was wonderful. It was like I lost him for a brief moment when I hadn’t. I spent all day indoors with him cherishing ever moment with him. He is my world. His laugh fills me with joy and seeing how he is progressing makes me a very proud father.

Kallam woke up at 5am on Sunday, just like he used to when I lived with my ex and so I was expecting this. We both went downstairs and watched Cbeebies, a children’s channel on TV. It brought back memories of when I would spend time with him for most of the day just watching TV and playing around on the floor. When the time came for Kallam to be collected by my ex and her trusty sidekick, they were late. Three hours late to be exact. They were supposed to pick him up at 2pm, but arrived at 5pm. The supposed reason being that her friend, who has the car, had to walk across town to get her car, but got lost and lost her keys. Whether this is the truth or whether they were doing something else and making up some sort of story is not known. I tend to think that they do this to test me and use me. Either way when they eventually turned up, I was sad to see Kallam go.

It’s fair to say that all this agro that she is putting me though is making my life just that bit harder to live. I’m trying my best not to resort to drinking. It’s no way to go, but I find myself whenever I am out drinking too much, but not so much that I am unable to get home or make a fool of myself. I realise this and I will get out of doing this and will just drink a little socially. I also won’t let her get the best of me, I won’t let her get me down and by golly I will be the better man and not rise to her torment and will not let her use me.

I’ve not yet finished touching up my pictures from Scotland, but after nit picking at them a bit longer I’ll post them all in a slideshow.

In the meantime, I’ll leave you with an excellent advert my good friend Emma did for me. Its excellent and is much appreciated.

While your at it, you can check out her blog by clicking the pic below.

Summarising Events

2008-07-29T11:44:00.007+01:00

Now, you may all notice I haven’t updated this blog for a bit. There are good reasons for this. Firstly, the amount of events going on has been overwhelming and secondly, I was off gallivanting around Scotland. I’ll try and fit it all into a short and sweet blog, but I warn you, I may ramble on a bit.

I’ll summarise the events of the past weeks as topics:

Alton Towers

The night prior to our day excursion to Alton Towers I slept at my good friends, who I like to call M&S. It was Shelle’s birthday soon and they had planned the trip well in advance, so I booked into their makeshift hotel to make sure I was up on time and didn’t miss the limo. Yes, you heard me right, we travelled there in a limo. It was cramped, with not enough leg space, but it’s not every day you travel in style, so I made the most of it by fiddling with the onboard gadgets like revolving cocktail stand, radio, air conditioning and TV. It kept me amused for the long ride. The photo to the right is of me and Kev, who was a cool guy and is a new friend.

We got there and for some reason I left my coat in the limo. Bad idea, because as soon as we entered the theme park, the dark clouds came-a-rollin in. I was drenched from head to toe and quickly bought one of those plastic macs. The others quickly followed suit and we all toured the theme park looking like contraceptives. Soon after, seeing as though I was going through the several stages of pneumonia, I bought a hoodie from the store to keep me warm.

And guess what..... I actually enjoyed the rides..... well the ones I kept my eyes open on. Closing my eyes made them go by faster. The scariest one was the nemesis. OMG! Upside down, over and under, at blistering speeds, but only lasted about two minutes. Two minutes of sheer terror. The best was one called Air. It really felt like you were flying.... with screaming people behind you, which spoiled it somewhat, but I enjoyed it the most out of all of them. I had to take my glasses off for all of the rides, because I nearly lost them during the first ride we went on. Without them on, the rides were all a blur, which made me even dizzier and jelly legged at the end of them. Dont ask what is going on in the picture to the right. Its most probably the weirdest picture i've seen. Mike opted for the "fook you pose", Kev chose the "chaotic pose" and I.....well chose the "normal scream for your life pose". lol The girl in the pictures below is Kate, shes a cool chick and was insistant on helping me with my nerves on most of the rides. No chance of a romance there, shes taken and not my type anyway :P

The evening came and we made our way home. I had a nap in the limo because I was so tired. When we got back we had a little get together with some other friends which was a laugh. Met some friends I hadn’t seen in a while and made some new ones. A crazy day but one I’ll remember for a while.

Scotland

Hungover from a all day gig the previous day and not really wanting to move any more then a few inches in any direction and a total fear of having my retnas burned out from too much sunlight it was safe to say I wasn’t in no mood to travel thousands of miles up to Scotland that day, but travel we did. We packed everything up and set off really early. I sat up front due to my travel sickness, which I admit isn’t that bad now that I’m older, but to be on the safe side I did. Soon after we set off, I started to nod off, my head bobbing like the Churchill dog. I made a tactical decision to swap with Andy, who was sleeping in the back on the motor homes couch. I thereafter slept all the way there in bliss.

We got there and quickly settled into the caravan and met my dad’s girlfriend’s dad and brother who resided at the holiday caravan during the summer. Later that day and through the week Andy showed me the beautiful scenery and took me for walks to take photos. A few days later there was a major parade. The village of Innerleithan has an event called Games Week, where everyone gets involved to celebrate Saint Ronan. There were several parades through the little village, which I got plenty of pictures also.

Edinburgh Castle

Later on in the week, Andrew’s brother Graham joined our company and soon after his girlfriend and her friend. The others quickly paired up, which left me with my part time companion Ivory my pet Chiuaua. Safe to say I felt a bit lonely. As the week went on I got over it and decided to make the most of the week by drinking and all things related to what happens when you drink, messing about and general tomfoolery. There was a fair there where I participated in bumping everyone to a pulp on the dodgems and being thrown about on this whirling contraption which made my bottom sore. Good times...

The last day in Scotland, I stated to everyone present “I wanna go up that hill!” (the words that I will regret to this day as the hill turned out to be a mountain). I pointed to the biggest one in view. Andrew offered his services as a Sherpa to guide me up this massive hill. The purpose of this mission was mostly to get really good pictures of the surroundings and of the valley the village was in. We started off fine with confidence in every step, but as soon as we were half way up a steep bit, all confidence deteriorated as my legs started to burn and I breathed heavily for enough oxygen. I also noticed that flies had become attracted to my head, mostly due to my hair gel. Having caught my breath and with a new dire need to escape the flies, we set off again fighting through the pain barrier.

Upon reaching a path near to the top, I collapsed in agony. I’m not sure of the distance we trekked, but it seemed like a mile or so up a steep hill. I fell to the stony ground and lay there as flies constantly buzzed around my head. I hate flies at the best of times when there is only one, but with about 30 buzzing in and out of my ears, I felt the need to quickly solve this problem. Unfortunately, I made the problem worse. I doused my head with a full bottle of freezing water. This not only made my gel more attractive to the flies, but froze me to the bone. So..... we ran. We ran up this path searching to get rid of the flies. Eventually, they died down to just one or two and I took some great pictures.

We eventually reached a path down, which turned out to be a mountain bike trail. It seemed more inviting then Andy’s preferred route down, which was to run down a steep hill. The mountain bike trail was full of hidden holes and bumps, it took its toll on my legs, but was fun to run up and down the side of this mini mountain. We made it to the bottom and walked wearily home to the caravan. The day after we made our way home in our lovely motor home.

I'll leave it at that for now, but promise as soon as I have finished modding the rest of the 159 photos I took. I'll post up a slideshow of all of the best ones. Theres a few vids too.

See ya

wish me luck

2008-07-10T14:41:00.010+01:00

Tomorrow I set off to one of Britains greatest theme parks and I should be excited and feelin like a kid again, but no, I'm nervous. I've had bad experiences on rollercoasters ever since childhood and they always, without fail, made me sick. I've not been on one for going on 12 years and I worry over whether its going to be the same now that I am older. Through looking at the videos of the rides, i think so. Check the one below out.

Wish me luck....

Pup on the Loose

2008-07-08T19:59:00.001+01:00

Found this picture through Deviant Art. Thought I would share it as it certainly caught my eye.

Preparations for the family trip up to Scotland are well on the way. We've sucessfully cleaned the motor home and it looks as good as new. Well, it looks like it was made in the 70s so its as good as it was back then lol. Its the type of vehicle that OAPs take touring across the country. Its got floral decorations on the interior, a cooker, shower, toilet and refridgerator and its taking us four up north to Scotland. Its going to be fun.

It looks a lot bigger then it actually is. Its quite small actually. Like I said its going to be fun travelling up to Scotland in it. The place we are actually going to is a small villiage outside of Edinburgh called Innerleithen. noting really to say about it apart from its a small village with many caravan parks, but i've been assured a good time and thats all that matters. I'll be taking my trusty camera to take pictures of the area and happenings and will be posting them after my trip. Below is a map of roughly where it is compared to where I live, shown by a red dot.

Today, we found a stay dog. Well, i say we, but our lodgers Andy and his mum Jan, my dads girlfriend found a dog in our garden. His collar reads Naz and it has a telephone number on it, but the phone number just rings out. Hes a beautiful Yorkshire Terrier and is a bit of an old pup. He seems to be getting along with our own dog Ivory who is a Chiuaua. Going to put posters around in local stores and chip shops saying that the dog has been found. Hopefully, someone will recognise and phone us to collect. Naz reminds me of the Yorkshire Terriers we used to have. I loved them loads, but both passed away for one reason or another.

Will update soon peeps. Catch ya later.

Lunar Lunacy

2008-07-05T21:45:00.005+01:00

Everyone knows theres some idiots out there, but this one takes the biscuit. The moon was mistaken for a "bright, stationary" UFO which had been loitering for at least half an hour, by a confused local in South Wales who made a 999 call to the police. Ok, the only similarity I see is that its in the sky and is bright lol. Some people can be extremely dumb. Other bizarre calls cited by the police force included someone asking for help voting for Rhydian a contestant on The X-Factor and another requesting a pound coin for their supermarket trolley. Conclusion: Some Brits are dumb.

Latest news: I'm overcoming my confidence issue more then expected. I seem to be coming out of my shell a lot lately and I feel really good about myself. I'm realising this bit by bit as the days go by, mostly through noticing that I'm talking to more people without threating over saying the right words and more recently phoning someone I have the hots for, who i met over the net and have been flirting with since around Nov 07. It was a big thing and I was told I came across quite well. Sucess! lol

My ex messed me about again today. *sigh* The story goes as follows: I realised early morning that there was no where to take the kids. This was due to the fact that all my family members had plans and plus it was raining heavily. I therefore phoned her to ask if it was possible to have the kids next weekend. This caused a tirade of nasty texts to be returned. Eventually, i phoned her and came to an agreement that I would take the kids for her for four hours at the local kids play area I've mentioned in previous posts and that she would pay. She seemed quite desperate to get rid of the kids, even though it was only for four hours. Five mins after collecting the kids we had a text argument (we text more then phoning, always have), which went like this:

EX: "C U at usual time 5. Take them park" (its weird how that little text caused me to go from calm to angry in a very little timeframe.)

ME: "How dare you change the time after I took the kids off you. That is not on. As the limbo players say, How low can you go?" (i thought that was a good retaliation at the time. sounds childish now)

EX: "lower then you mal. Your a selfish guy"

ME: "How dare you turn this around so I am the bad one. Its all you, you bitch"

EX: "bring them bk at 3pm, i am running late as it is"

ME: "No, 2pm, like we agreed"

EX: "I said 2.30pm. It cums to sum things wen i have to force you to have your own son"

ME: "No, its being reasonable, not forcing. Them glasses you have are obviously bitch goggles, you see stuff which ain't right" (i felt this was OTT and sad, but i was really angry)

EX: "lmao, you are so sad" (sad = lame, I agree that last comment was lame lol)

ME: "you are sadder then sad" (even lamer I know. I was fuming mad at this point)

EX: "take kids park till 4pm"

ME: "no, you said 2.30pm and that is what time I'm bringing them back, like it or not. Its been raining and the park will be wet".

EX: "it won't be mal. I've gota do two more trips"

ME: "yes, it will. It rained quite hard before. Will be taking them yours at 2.30pm, be there." (It felt good texting be there. Quite like a hollywood film)

EX: "k***head"

ME: "will you be there or not"

EX: "no, but my fella will be there" (first time shes ever referred to her "lodger" as being her fela breakthough in closure methinks)

ME: "will be there in a mo"

I got to her house after a long bus ride to be greeted by "her fella". Its good to finally label him, as for a long time he has just been a good friend, although I knew that he was seeing her and living with her. He doesn't seem a good enough role model for my son or stepson. Worse thing is i can't hate him. Hes cool. He goes concerts, he likes gaming and he has an ok personality. He seems to be a lounge about and a scrounger though which is bad. I remind myself though its her thats causing me the grief and so i should focus my defences and counter attacks at her if needs be.

Anyways, when i drop kids off, she is in her pyjamas and chilling with her friend Amy (as mentioned in previous blog about hospital trip). Seems that she has been at home all day. Which seems to back up my assumption that she lies to me and uses me.....a lot. Not good.

Anyways, that was today over with. A nightmare of a day followed by a highlight tonight of finally talking to an online friend over the telephone. It was cool.

I'll leave you with this funny pic i found online entitled "If your ex girlfriend had an IMDB page". Its quite suitable but not all of it relates tome. i hope it gives you readers some giggles.

Thirteen Thursday (Friday)

2008-07-04T14:00:00.002+01:00

Thirteen Things about Malcolm
1. I am a divorcee. I was married once. The anniversary of that dreaded day is today.

2. I sing most of the time when not in work.

3. My dream is to be a lead singer of a band.

4. I am a big Beatles fan and have been since a kid. I have numerous LPs and every CD. I've been on the offical Beatles tour numerous times.

5. I tore a ligament in my left knee messing around playing football with kids when i was 18, even though i tell everyone i was playing proper football lol shhhhh

6. I prefer dogs to cats. My family have had pet dogs since i was born and have been a part of my life since.

7. I'm an internet addict. I go on it in work, at home, on my mobile and i probably sleep surf. I try in vain to cut down lol

8. I am a PA for a solicitor/lawyer who specialises in Personal Injury, which basically consists of typing letters, answering phones and scheduling appointments.

9. I'm a real positive thinking guy. I try not to let bad news get me down. I live to make others around me laugh.

10. I'm a big kid. I climb climbing frames, i jump around and I even act like one to entertain them lol Its safe to say i've not failed at making one laugh yet.

11. I live for music. I used to listen to music on the way to work daily, but since my mp3 player died on me i've been music-less. At home I can't stand the silence, so i put tunes on.

12. All my relationships so far have been founded through the marvelous invention of the net. My first being from the US (texas and the one i married/divorced)and my second being a little closer to home with whom i spilt from recently.

13. I can make "breaking wind" noises with my hands. Its a kind of party trick and has everyone trying to do it lol

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"I'm on tha highway to hell....."

2008-07-02T11:23:00.004+01:00

Yesterday, I took the day off work because my son Kallam was due to have a prosthetic arm fitted. After reading that back to myself, I feel a back-story is going to be required here about Kallam, my only son. It was during the latter part of my ex’s pregnancy that doctors noticed that Kallam didn’t have a left arm from just below the elbow. It took us quite a while to come to terms with this, but eventually, we accepted it and carried on. It was suspected that a line formed across her womb and became tangled around his arm when it was first developing. It could have happened to anyone, although it is very rare. On 29th September 2007, Kallam Thomas Keenan was born and from the minute of holding him all doubts and worries went out of the window. He was the most beautiful baby I had ever seen and I fell in love with him straight away.

From that day on, Kallam continued to fill my life with joy and happiness, as every smile he made was beautiful in itself. I couldn’t imagine my life without him. He was like a part of me I never knew. He either recognised my voice from when he was in the womb or something, because every time I talked, he smiled and looked at me and even to this day he recognises my voice and knows for a fact I’m his father. It’s something that fills me with pride.

The months flew by and day by day he progressed and took baby steps to becoming a bigger and cleverer baby. Each advancement that took place, be it grabbing his dummy or making the tiniest of noises, made me the proudest dad alive.

In March 2007, me and my ex split. She had found someone else and I moved back to my fathers. This meant I only got to see Kallam of a weekend, which wasn’t enough in my view, but it would have to be enough. Since then, every time I see Kallam, he has advanced through the time I haven’t seen him and I’ve missed stuff that every dad should see and every time I realise that, I ask why me? Why do I get put in this situation when there are guys out there beating up their partner, drinking or doing drugs? Having said that, every time I see him smile when he first sees me when I pick him up, all those feelings fade away and I become happy again.

Now that everything is up to date Kallam-wise, I’ll continue. Yesterday, I took the day off to attend at a hospital near Liverpool to collect Kallam’s prosthetic arm. I had asked my ex if I could catch a ride with them, my ex and her friend Amy, because the hospital was so far away. I had to set off early to be at my ex’s for 9am on the dot, as she said that if I am not there by 9am, they will leave without me. So I made extra effort to leave early enough to take into account late busses. I got there with time to spare and waited inside for them to get ready. I was told that I would have to sit in the back seat in between two car seats. One for Kallam and one for my ex’s friend Amy’s baby Grace. It was a tight squeeze and very hot. I felt very uncomfortable, but it was a free ride and I didn’t complain.

Earlier this month, Kay had asked me for £50 to buy a car seat for Kallam, so I gave her the money thinking of Kallam’s safety. I knew they were going on holiday and I didn’t want Kallam to go without. However, when looking at his car seat. It was the old one we used to use ages ago, all tattered and stained. I quickly asked, “I thought you bought a new car seat?”. She replied “I had to return the one I bought because it was faulty”. I left it at that because I knew that if one wrong word was said by me, I’d be stranded somewhere or something. That is how my ex and her friend work, they have done it to me before. So, I let it slide. I’ll probably text her today asking her why or what did she do with the money. I may be paranoid or something, but I feel that she has a plan to ring out of me as much money as she can, but using Kallam as a tool to make me pay up. She always asks for money for milk and stuff he would need and stuff that I can't really say no to. Its frustrating. The £100 I pay monthly should really be enough for the entire month.

The journey continued and once or twice I feared for my left. My ex’s 21 yr old friend and someone I used to call a friend, Amy was driving all over the road and at one point veered close to the edge of the motorway all because she was looking at the shining reflection her hair band gave. She laughed it off and continued while I was there holding onto whatever I could and was in shock. On other occasions, she went the wrong way once or twice even though she had been there four times previously. All the while my ex and her were obviously making extra effort to seem as happy as possible often looking back to see my reaction. The odd sly comments were passed back to me and I’ve never realised how difficult it is to bite your tongue from saying something either defensively or from saying something bad yourself. I had to try my hardest from snapping back, but succeeded non the less, mostly because I was feeling nauseous from the bad driving.

We got there and decided to get some breakfast. I noticed that they paid extra attention to how much I spent while we were there, but they didn’t say anything and I didn’t speak a word to them for fear that I might cause some kind of argument and be stranded in this unknown place. So I buried my head in a newspaper and played with the babies.

Next was the appointment. All went well and normal, although I was shocked by the way Kallam reacted to the arm and felt my heart bleed at them trying to put on this fake arm and with him crying, seeing it as some kind of experiment. I am of the view he is far too young to have a prosthetic, he should be at least five years old before they do anything like that, but my ex decided to have one now after deciding to ignore my views on it. I will post pictures of it when I get the opportunity to upload them.

After all that was done, the journey home appeared to be the same as the journey there. They dropped me off near to where they were going and left me to get the bus home. I arrived home and just basically relaxed for the rest of the day with the exception of preparing our campervan for our holiday coming up to Scotland. It was filthy. We jet washed it and buffed it up and it looks band new now except for some rust spots. All of us, Me, Andy, my dad and his girlfriend are all supposed to travel in it up to Scotland, which should be fun. Again, pictures of it will be posted at a later date, most probably when I actually get back from the holiday. Lol

I’ll update this blog later on.

For now, take some time to visit a good friend of mine’s blog, called Emma’s Dilemmas and Great Expectations. It’s a very good read and has loads of interesting entries. Most recently, it has some really good advice entries in the blog. Kinda like the instruction book to life that I’m lacking come to think of it. I may have found it in this blog. Lol

Darkness Consumes

2008-06-27T20:28:00.009+01:00

No, this isn't a moody blog! Its more metaphorical. There I sat earlier on in total darkness apart from the slither of light breaking its way into the room from what was left of the light outside. The lights had gone. I strained hard to find the right keys to press in vain. Frustration follows shortly thereafter. I couldn't stay in the darkness no more! I had to find a solution. In vain I scoured the house for one solitary bulb, but alas!.....no. I forked out what farthings I had in my measly wallet and headed yonder for the nearest convenience store.

I asked the store helper, "one of your best illuminating bulbs please kind folk"*. Upon receipt of said buld, I trotted back home with joy. Oh darkness begone back from whence you came! I inserted soon after inserted the bulb into an orimental lamp showing a classic 50s era lady complete with fan and..... turned her on.... LIGHT. Not ridding the darkness completely, but enough to type by, I was indeed satisfied. On with the typing I say!

Enough with that fancy talk.... my alter ego Earnest Pennyworth slipped forth.

Recent events. I was supposed to be going out with friends tonight to Liverpool no less, home of one of my all time favorate bands, The Beatles and to the Cavern no less, the venue the Beatles played at (not the real cavern as us Beatle fans know). Unfortunately, I couldn't go. Being responsible was the reason. I needed to get there somehow and the stress of rushing for trains and whatnots left me feeling queasy before even setting off. Reluctantly, I left it at that. I had promised a different friend, James, as mentioned in previous blogs, that I'd be joining him tomorrow night. Plus, I have my son, Kallam and step son Rhys tomorrow daytime and as all parents know, you have to be at your best to deal with their antics lol

Nothing much else to report on. Had a few beers, so I ain't in a literative kinda mood :P

Will update when something substantial happens.

ciao

PS. heres a gr8 video of the Big Bro housemates trying to recreate Ok Go!'s music vid. check it out

Decisions, Decisons...

2008-06-24T22:19:00.006+01:00

So, just came back from trying out Cloverfield on my dad.......no success lol I guessed as much. Its a certainty that films of that nature can be grasped more by the younger generation then the generation previously, namely Mr Malcolm Keenan Snr.

Work went alright today for a change. Flew by. This lead me on an investigative route to find out why on some days time seems to fly by and on others time just seems to drag. I searched Yahoo Answers for some clues.

So maybe time doesn't fly when clock watch through the working day. Intriguing hmmm. It is true though, I didn't hardly look at the time and the day seemed fly by. thanks MissCy for your helpful answer lol

Also thanks to a Firefox add on that allows me to extract video, screenshots, images and songs from any website and post them to blogger straight away. The add on is called Dashblog. Try looking it up if you are looking for something to make posting pictures you find or such like easier.

To recent news again. I have a dilemma! Here is how it goes. A few friends of mine have asked me to join them for a full day of fun at Alton Towers to celebrate someones birthday. The whole day will cost in excess of £100, which includes a limo ride, free beer, queue jumping at Alton Towers and snacks and stuff when we get there. All seems good there.... I could either live spontaneously and go not thinking of whether I can afford the rest of the months food and living money or I could be a responsible 25 year old and not go, stay at home all day probably surfing the net being a hermit.... Its a toughy. Then theres Andy,my dad's girlfriend's son. Hes reminded me that a long time ago, say a couple of months ago, he asked me to go up to Scotland to meet his family and that it would mean a lot. It wouldn't mean spending a lot of money, but it promises to be cold, boring at times and uncomfortable trying to understand a word people say up there. I'll have to make my mind up. I feel that if I let the decision simmer in my brain, the answer will come forth.

Right.... a more direct action is needed. Wheres my magic 8 ball? aaaah, here it is. Now what to ask..... Oh, Magic 8 Ball, Should I follow the entertainment, irresponsible path and go with friends to Alton Towers??

ok. ok. So the magic 8 ball made the decision that was going to decide on anyway. Temptations got the best of me. I should be ok later in the month if my ex pays me the money she owes me, which she promises she will.

Anyways, will sleep on it despite what my ball says. It may take more thought then expected. Any comments are appreciated however.

update ya later!

Cloverfield UK DVD Review

2008-06-24T11:50:00.005+01:00

Heres the first in many reviews on games, DVDs, movies and music I'll be posting in upcoming months. This time I'm reviewing Cloverfield's UK DVD release.

For starters, I absolutely loved this film. I followed its viral marketing campaign for over half a year before its release, which shows how much I was into this film.

After seeing the film at the cinemas in early February of this year, I was amazed. The film blew me away. Mind-numbing effects, brilliant acting, humour, romance and action. The film had it all. Its main concept was - what if you could watch a monster movie from the perspective of someone down on ground level, someone completely unimportant in the grand scheme of things, someone completely unable to do anything but watch the city crumble around them? The innovating thinking of all those involved made this film a landmark in movie history.

Onto the DVD review. Unlike most movies, Cloverfield, in my view, hasn't lost its impact when taken from the big screen and put onto DVD. This is mainly because Cloverfield's format, being like a personal home video, shaky and seemingly amature, it looks more real when views on household televisions. Saying that though, the film was amazing to watch at the cinema, but with most televisions and surround sound, it is easy to replicate the atmostphere of the cinema at home. Problem solved.

Disc 2 is jammed packed with extra material - an extensive Making Of documentary, a look at how the visual effects for the film were created, and a featurette entitled "I saw it, it's alive, it's huge!", which explains JJ Abrams' interest in Godzilla and covers creature designer Neville Page's conception of the Clover monster itself. 'Clover Fun' is a series of bloopers, in a way - mostly T.J. Miller, who played Hud, improvising silly dialogue, but also other cast members horseing around or accidentally catching members of the crew in their in-character taping, and props behaving like they have minds of their own.

There are four deleted scenes, with optional commentary from Matt Reeves, which are entertaining enough in themselves, but no great loss to the film (except maybe a moment between Lily and Marlena), and two alternate endings, one which doesn't change the outcome of the main storyline, but instead replaces the final footage of Rob and Beth at Coney Island with another scene of blissful, pre-monster ignorance, and one which does sort of change the ending of the movie, implying that perhaps Rob and Beth were rescued, maybe. The version used in the actual film is probably the best, but these are nice too methinks.

There are loads of hidden extras. I won't list them here, as searching for them yourself can make it all the more enjoyable.

Movie:

Extras: (only four because region 1 DVDs have more extras grrrr)