Recently been feeling the need to move on with my life, get some motion going instead of being stationary at a pit stop with no engineers. The pit stop being my dad’s house. I started my adult life there moving out with my now ex, had a family and it all fell through and then with an emotional car crash of a heart I went back to my dad’s for a pit stop.
It never meant to be a permanent stay and after more than half a year, I think it’s time to move on. To where though? With property prices rising and rising, even property to let prices are sky high, checked one a couple of weeks back and the rent was unaffordable for me. I guess I should keep looking. Then there’s the cold empty loneliness that will be there whenever I go to this new accommodation. That in itself does not seem inviting. With living with my dad and his girlfriend, I at least have the company if needed. I seem to be wanting to move on but with nowhere to move on to. I will have to keep searching. Maybe it isn’t the right time yet. Maybe it will all happen in the new year. This year has not been kind to me at all and I want to leave it behind and start with 09 already. Sheesh lol
On a lighter note, Halloween came and went as fast as a speeding train and with it went memories of a good night with friends. I was invited to a good friend’s house for Halloween and they emphasised that it was fancy dress. So, I got to work on figuring out what to go as. I dismissed going as anything too predictable, e.g. a ghost, a vampire, the devil, Dale Winton and opted to go as something cool but still scary. I decided after a few days of intense pondering, to go as The Punisher. The Marvel character seemed ideal, with a big scary skull on his front, guns, a leather knee length coat and overall just seemed bad ass. I already had the leather coat, thanks to my dad buying one way back when and all I needed was the skull t-shirt.
Being the kind of laid back guy I am I left it to last minute and ordered one through play.com, but with two days to go to Halloween I was panicking. The costume all depended on this t-shirt. I decided to make my own just to be safe. I printed off the skull picture and enlarged it to A3 (twice the size of normal paper, not sure on US size of paper). Then I went and bought some thick white fabric. I cut out the skull logo and pinned it onto the fabric and cut out the skull. It turned out to be quite enjoyable and not as hard as I first thought. I then got my dad’s girlfriend to stitch it onto an old t shirt and the deed was done. The end product looked amazing. I felt accomplished and decided to wear the t-shirt no matter what, even if the t-shirt I ordered came in the post. (which it did yesterday – it looked below average compared to my home made one)
The day after I was a bit worse for wear, but I pulled myself together after a few cups of coffee and a few bananas. I went to pick my son up and had a great day at my sisters. Hes getting to be a little cheeky now, grrring and smiling his face off. Gotta love him; he means the world to me and I can’t imagine life now without him. I could write a whole blog about how he makes my life worthwhile, or perhaps how his smile brightens my day, how proud of him I am, or maybe all these things. I however will not write these things, but will let them out occasionally in blog posts, as too much adoration can spoil things.
Sunday was spent going to see my nephew play rugby. (Thats him in black to the right fighting a losing battle of getting the ball past the opposition. I took many photos that day, most of which are in my facebook, so i cannot link to them unfortunately.) He has major potential, with enough encouragement to be a big league rugby star. He carries his team, tackling and scoring more than the others and he is often in the paper. Having effectively brought him up with my sister when she was a single mum, I feel in a way as if he was my own and I am proud of him. He is a bit misguided when out with friends as we all are at that age (13), however I try to give advice where and when I can. Not to mention my niece Jade (16) who I am also proud of. She is doing well at school and is about to go on to college. She’s got a well developed personality and is very mature. I told her the other day how the whole family are proud of her in a heartfelt internet convo and I meant every word. (she probably thought I was drunk or something or off my rocker lol)
That’s about it for an update. Will update when I have some news.
3 comments:
Great to hear you had a good weekend at the party etc! get you in your costume ;)
I think with your life being at a standstill you need to focus on one aim and achieve that before considering anything else.
You mentioned in the past wanting to get your driving lessons sorted and pass your test. Focus on doing that for now even live without buying luxuries for a cpl of months while you sort that out - you'll feel better for it x
keep walking bro!
I'm also trying to find my will I'll be there some time... hopefully soon!
but keep walking!!!
and BTW... come pimp my blog!!! ;)
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