Lunar Lunacy

Everyone knows theres some idiots out there, but this one takes the biscuit. The moon was mistaken for a "bright, stationary" UFO which had been loitering for at least half an hour, by a confused local in South Wales who made a 999 call to the police. Ok, the only similarity I see is that its in the sky and is bright lol. Some people can be extremely dumb. Other bizarre calls cited by the police force included someone asking for help voting for Rhydian a contestant on The X-Factor and another requesting a pound coin for their supermarket trolley. Conclusion: Some Brits are dumb.

Latest news: I'm overcoming my confidence issue more then expected. I seem to be coming out of my shell a lot lately and I feel really good about myself. I'm realising this bit by bit as the days go by, mostly through noticing that I'm talking to more people without threating over saying the right words and more recently phoning someone I have the hots for, who i met over the net and have been flirting with since around Nov 07. It was a big thing and I was told I came across quite well. Sucess! lol

My ex messed me about again today. *sigh* The story goes as follows: I realised early morning that there was no where to take the kids. This was due to the fact that all my family members had plans and plus it was raining heavily. I therefore phoned her to ask if it was possible to have the kids next weekend. This caused a tirade of nasty texts to be returned. Eventually, i phoned her and came to an agreement that I would take the kids for her for four hours at the local kids play area I've mentioned in previous posts and that she would pay. She seemed quite desperate to get rid of the kids, even though it was only for four hours. Five mins after collecting the kids we had a text argument (we text more then phoning, always have), which went like this:

EX: "C U at usual time 5. Take them park" (its weird how that little text caused me to go from calm to angry in a very little timeframe.)

ME: "How dare you change the time after I took the kids off you. That is not on. As the limbo players say, How low can you go?" (i thought that was a good retaliation at the time. sounds childish now)

EX: "lower then you mal. Your a selfish guy"

ME: "How dare you turn this around so I am the bad one. Its all you, you bitch"

EX: "bring them bk at 3pm, i am running late as it is"

ME: "No, 2pm, like we agreed"

EX: "I said 2.30pm. It cums to sum things wen i have to force you to have your own son"

ME: "No, its being reasonable, not forcing. Them glasses you have are obviously bitch goggles, you see stuff which ain't right" (i felt this was OTT and sad, but i was really angry)

EX: "lmao, you are so sad" (sad = lame, I agree that last comment was lame lol)

ME: "you are sadder then sad" (even lamer I know. I was fuming mad at this point)

EX: "take kids park till 4pm"

ME: "no, you said 2.30pm and that is what time I'm bringing them back, like it or not. Its been raining and the park will be wet".

EX: "it won't be mal. I've gota do two more trips"

ME: "yes, it will. It rained quite hard before. Will be taking them yours at 2.30pm, be there." (It felt good texting be there. Quite like a hollywood film)

EX: "k***head"

ME: "will you be there or not"

EX: "no, but my fella will be there" (first time shes ever referred to her "lodger" as being her fela breakthough in closure methinks)

ME: "will be there in a mo"

I got to her house after a long bus ride to be greeted by "her fella". Its good to finally label him, as for a long time he has just been a good friend, although I knew that he was seeing her and living with her. He doesn't seem a good enough role model for my son or stepson. Worse thing is i can't hate him. Hes cool. He goes concerts, he likes gaming and he has an ok personality. He seems to be a lounge about and a scrounger though which is bad. I remind myself though its her thats causing me the grief and so i should focus my defences and counter attacks at her if needs be.

Anyways, when i drop kids off, she is in her pyjamas and chilling with her friend Amy (as mentioned in previous blog about hospital trip). Seems that she has been at home all day. Which seems to back up my assumption that she lies to me and uses me.....a lot. Not good.

Anyways, that was today over with. A nightmare of a day followed by a highlight tonight of finally talking to an online friend over the telephone. It was cool.

I'll leave you with this funny pic i found online entitled "If your ex girlfriend had an IMDB page". Its quite suitable but not all of it relates tome. i hope it gives you readers some giggles.

Thirteen Thursday (Friday)

Thirteen Things about Malcolm 1. I am a divorcee. I was married once. The anniversary of that dreaded day is today. 2. I sing most of the time when not in work. 3. My dream is to be a lead singer of a band. 4. I am a big Beatles fan and have been since a kid. I have numerous LPs and every CD. I've been on the offical Beatles tour numerous times. 5. I tore a ligament in my left knee messing around playing football with kids when i was 18, even though i tell everyone i was playing proper football lol shhhhh 6. I prefer dogs to cats. My family have had pet dogs since i was born and have been a part of my life since. 7. I'm an internet addict. I go on it in work, at home, on my mobile and i probably sleep surf. I try in vain to cut down lol 8. I am a PA for a solicitor/lawyer who specialises in Personal Injury, which basically consists of typing letters, answering phones and scheduling appointments. 9. I'm a real positive thinking guy. I try not to let bad news get me down. I live to make others around me laugh. 10. I'm a big kid. I climb climbing frames, i jump around and I even act like one to entertain them lol Its safe to say i've not failed at making one laugh yet. 11. I live for music. I used to listen to music on the way to work daily, but since my mp3 player died on me i've been music-less. At home I can't stand the silence, so i put tunes on. 12. All my relationships so far have been founded through the marvelous invention of the net. My first being from the US (texas and the one i married/divorced)and my second being a little closer to home with whom i spilt from recently. 13. I can make "breaking wind" noises with my hands. Its a kind of party trick and has everyone trying to do it lol

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"I'm on tha highway to hell....."

Yesterday, I took the day off work because my son Kallam was due to have a prosthetic arm fitted. After reading that back to myself, I feel a back-story is going to be required here about Kallam, my only son. It was during the latter part of my ex’s pregnancy that doctors noticed that Kallam didn’t have a left arm from just below the elbow. It took us quite a while to come to terms with this, but eventually, we accepted it and carried on. It was suspected that a line formed across her womb and became tangled around his arm when it was first developing. It could have happened to anyone, although it is very rare. On 29th September 2007, Kallam Thomas Keenan was born and from the minute of holding him all doubts and worries went out of the window. He was the most beautiful baby I had ever seen and I fell in love with him straight away.

From that day on, Kallam continued to fill my life with joy and happiness, as every smile he made was beautiful in itself. I couldn’t imagine my life without him. He was like a part of me I never knew. He either recognised my voice from when he was in the womb or something, because every time I talked, he smiled and looked at me and even to this day he recognises my voice and knows for a fact I’m his father. It’s something that fills me with pride.

The months flew by and day by day he progressed and took baby steps to becoming a bigger and cleverer baby. Each advancement that took place, be it grabbing his dummy or making the tiniest of noises, made me the proudest dad alive.

In March 2007, me and my ex split. She had found someone else and I moved back to my fathers. This meant I only got to see Kallam of a weekend, which wasn’t enough in my view, but it would have to be enough. Since then, every time I see Kallam, he has advanced through the time I haven’t seen him and I’ve missed stuff that every dad should see and every time I realise that, I ask why me? Why do I get put in this situation when there are guys out there beating up their partner, drinking or doing drugs? Having said that, every time I see him smile when he first sees me when I pick him up, all those feelings fade away and I become happy again.

Now that everything is up to date Kallam-wise, I’ll continue. Yesterday, I took the day off to attend at a hospital near Liverpool to collect Kallam’s prosthetic arm. I had asked my ex if I could catch a ride with them, my ex and her friend Amy, because the hospital was so far away. I had to set off early to be at my ex’s for 9am on the dot, as she said that if I am not there by 9am, they will leave without me. So I made extra effort to leave early enough to take into account late busses. I got there with time to spare and waited inside for them to get ready. I was told that I would have to sit in the back seat in between two car seats. One for Kallam and one for my ex’s friend Amy’s baby Grace. It was a tight squeeze and very hot. I felt very uncomfortable, but it was a free ride and I didn’t complain.

Earlier this month, Kay had asked me for £50 to buy a car seat for Kallam, so I gave her the money thinking of Kallam’s safety. I knew they were going on holiday and I didn’t want Kallam to go without. However, when looking at his car seat. It was the old one we used to use ages ago, all tattered and stained. I quickly asked, “I thought you bought a new car seat?”. She replied “I had to return the one I bought because it was faulty”. I left it at that because I knew that if one wrong word was said by me, I’d be stranded somewhere or something. That is how my ex and her friend work, they have done it to me before. So, I let it slide. I’ll probably text her today asking her why or what did she do with the money. I may be paranoid or something, but I feel that she has a plan to ring out of me as much money as she can, but using Kallam as a tool to make me pay up. She always asks for money for milk and stuff he would need and stuff that I can't really say no to. Its frustrating. The £100 I pay monthly should really be enough for the entire month.

The journey continued and once or twice I feared for my left. My ex’s 21 yr old friend and someone I used to call a friend, Amy was driving all over the road and at one point veered close to the edge of the motorway all because she was looking at the shining reflection her hair band gave. She laughed it off and continued while I was there holding onto whatever I could and was in shock. On other occasions, she went the wrong way once or twice even though she had been there four times previously. All the while my ex and her were obviously making extra effort to seem as happy as possible often looking back to see my reaction. The odd sly comments were passed back to me and I’ve never realised how difficult it is to bite your tongue from saying something either defensively or from saying something bad yourself. I had to try my hardest from snapping back, but succeeded non the less, mostly because I was feeling nauseous from the bad driving.

We got there and decided to get some breakfast. I noticed that they paid extra attention to how much I spent while we were there, but they didn’t say anything and I didn’t speak a word to them for fear that I might cause some kind of argument and be stranded in this unknown place. So I buried my head in a newspaper and played with the babies.

Next was the appointment. All went well and normal, although I was shocked by the way Kallam reacted to the arm and felt my heart bleed at them trying to put on this fake arm and with him crying, seeing it as some kind of experiment. I am of the view he is far too young to have a prosthetic, he should be at least five years old before they do anything like that, but my ex decided to have one now after deciding to ignore my views on it. I will post pictures of it when I get the opportunity to upload them.

After all that was done, the journey home appeared to be the same as the journey there. They dropped me off near to where they were going and left me to get the bus home. I arrived home and just basically relaxed for the rest of the day with the exception of preparing our campervan for our holiday coming up to Scotland. It was filthy. We jet washed it and buffed it up and it looks band new now except for some rust spots. All of us, Me, Andy, my dad and his girlfriend are all supposed to travel in it up to Scotland, which should be fun. Again, pictures of it will be posted at a later date, most probably when I actually get back from the holiday. Lol

I’ll update this blog later on.

For now, take some time to visit a good friend of mine’s blog, called Emma’s Dilemmas and Great Expectations. It’s a very good read and has loads of interesting entries. Most recently, it has some really good advice entries in the blog. Kinda like the instruction book to life that I’m lacking come to think of it. I may have found it in this blog. Lol