Musical Monday

OMG how great is Rock Band 2. Addicted much. There was me thinking Guitar Hero was the shiz, but then I decide to buy Rock Band and it’s twice as entertaining and loads more songs. Shame I only have it on the ps2 at the moment and not on the Xbox 360 where I could have shared my achievements and show off my guitar shredding skills. Over the weekend to keep me entertained and happy I’ve been playing along to songs such as Livin on a Prayer, Everlong, The Middle and White Wedding no less. I even sing along, now that’s rock n roll...... or sad, depends on how you look at it. Lol I’m currently working my way through the hard difficulty and might even set about mastering Expert, but after nearly breaking a finger trying to play Metalica’s Battery, I think I’ll just give that a miss.

Anyways, seeing as its musical Monday, I might as well share another song that has meant something to me from my past. This week’s song is Everlong by Foo Fighters.

The reasons why I chose Everlong, firstly is well because the Foo Fighters rock, secondly it reminds me of when I went to see them live last year. Wow that was a night to remember. When Dave Grohl stopped messing about as he normally does with his goofy humour (which is one of the reasons why he ranks so highly in my fave celeb list) he started playing Everlong while on his own seemingly floating above the crowd on the runway type thing that extended from the stage into the crowd. The entire stadium fell silent as he played the intro and the atmosphere was electric. When the chorus came about though everyone was rocking out and it was amazing. The song itself is amazing. One of my favourites in fact and I thought I would share it with you lot.

To my weekend update....

Nothing much happened over the weekend apart from having Kallam during the day, which went great as usual and going out on Saturday night.

Me and Kallam spent Saturday at my sisters, which would have been good if not for the tension that fills that house whenever I go. This is due to my sis and her husband always falling out. It’s like one big massive argument that has lasted for years and doesn’t seem to be getting any better. They drink to drown their sorrows, end up fighting most nights and are caught up in what looks like a destructive cycle of anger, tension and depression. Wish I could help really, as its hard seeing my sister go through it all. I’ve tried to give advice, but she will not listen. She said to me this weekend that she is going to be getting a place of her own soon and getting a legal separation. Maybe that is for the best. It’s not nice to spend time there when my sis is trying to put as much distance between herself and her husband causing friction and tension. I probably won’t go there again. It’s very uncomfortable and tense.

Saturday night came and I was glad to be out of the house and party on down without a worry in the world. Things didn’t go to plan though. We got into town early and most of the places were only just opening so we went to a pub which was fairly lively and set about getting drinks in. We hit the beer hard and when it came to going to the other bars in town, I was feeling sick and just not in the mood at all. Feeling sick and eating myself up inside like I normally do when my confidence gets in the way and not approaching anyone, I just was depressed.

There were many girls/women I could have approached a few who looked approachable, but something within was holding me back. Fear of rejection maybe. I get stroppy when I drink if things don’t go to plan I now see when looking back. I don't realise it at the time. I need to stop thinking the girls will approach me, as that just doesn’t happen. They wait for you to go to them. So, instead of just standing there gawping at any girls that walk past, I’m going to approach some next time and make an effort. It’s the only way to defeat my inner demons. At the end of the night, I had a dance with a few, but by then I just wasn’t in the mood so I told my friend and we got off in a taxi still feeling sick and depressed.

As usual, I got over it fairly fast the following morning with other things to think about; the boring day ahead, my head which was banging like a bass drum and the need for coffee. Its only when looking back at how crap I am on a night out that I pity myself and want to set about getting out of this phase. When I look deeper into myself I am unable to just have fun on a night out and seem to want a more serious thing, which I need to stop doing. I asked someone out that I met a week back and she said that she was only looking for fun having gotten out of a major relationship so I left it. Met her again on sat night and because I was still sulking majorly, I declined to dance with her and I feel really bad for it now. *sighs*. I’m just hopeless.

That’s my rant for today....god I went on a bit didn’t I lol Thats what blogs are for though ay. Now I'm working for the weekend again and I am looking forward to going to see The Fray with my good friend Sarah. Fun times.